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Some people believe that robots are important for humans to develop their future, while others think that it is a dangerous invention that will impact society negatively. Discuss both sides and give your opinion. v.1

Some people believe that robots are important for humans to develop their future, while others think that it is a dangerous invention that will impact society negatively. v. 1
It has been believed by some that machine is essential for humans to build their future while others disagree with this and say, it will have a negative effect on civilization. In my opinion, this is a positive development. This essay will discuss both views: positive development of the community, which consist of not only increase in production, but also reduce human efforts; and its disadvantages, which includes high founding price and making people jobless. To begin with positive side, some people, including me, have an opinion that robots are good for society and they are helping mankind in increasing production. We all know that population are increasing day by day and to match demand, we need to increase productivity because they can work non stop without taking any break. Secondly, a mechanical person helps humans to reduce effort as well. Because they are built to perform a specific job and once implemented, they can work without any human efforts. For example, My uncle has a shoe factory and in the past, they were able to produce only 100 pieces per person. However, later they move with technology and now their production increases by seven times. On the flip side, there are some minor drawbacks of technology as well. Firstly, they have a high establishment amount. We cannot deny that machines are expensive and price of implementation is much higher. Secondly, due to this employee will lose their jobs as machines are cost effective after initial establishment cost. To illustrate with an example, according to a survey from The Harward university, the majority of people will lose their jobs in next 10 years due to robots. To conclude, I agree with this view that robots are essential to humans and society and it helps in increasing productivity and reducing human efforts. Although, some persons think that this will have negative impacts on the society due to the high establishment worth and human being will lose their jobs.
It has
been believed
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
that machine is essential for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
humans
to build their future while others disagree with this and say, it will have a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effect on civilization. In my opinion, this is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
development. This essay will discuss both views:
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
development of the community, which consist of not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
increase in production,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
efforts
; and its disadvantages, which includes high founding price and making
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
jobless.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
side,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
, including me, have an opinion that robots are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
for
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
society and
they are helping mankind in increasing production. We all know that population are increasing day by day and to match demand, we need to increase productivity
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they can work non
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
without taking any break.
Secondly
, a mechanical person
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
humans
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
effort
as well
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
they
are built
to perform a specific
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
and once implemented, they can work without any
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
efforts
.
For example
, My uncle has a shoe factory and in the past, they were able to produce
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
100 pieces per person.
However
, later they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
with technology and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
their production increases by seven times.

On the flip side, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
minor drawbacks of technology
as well
.
Firstly
, they have a high establishment amount. We cannot deny that machines are expensive and price of implementation is much higher.
Secondly
, due to this employee will lose their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
as machines
are cost
effective after initial establishment cost. To illustrate with an example, according to a survey from The
Possible spelling mistake found.
Harward
university, the majority of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
will lose their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
in
next
10 years due to robots.

To conclude
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this view that robots are essential to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
humans
and society and it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
in increasing productivity and reducing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
efforts
. Although,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
persons
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that this will have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impacts on the society due to the high establishment worth and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
being will lose their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
jobs
.
8.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people believe that robots are important for humans to develop their future, while others think that it is a dangerous invention that will impact society negatively. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
327 words
8.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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