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Some people think that all university students should study whatever they like. Others believe that they should only be allowed to study subjects that will be useful in the future, such as those related to science and technology. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. v. 106 v.61

Some people think that all university students should study whatever they like. Others believe that they should only be allowed to study subjects that will be useful in the future, such as those related to science and technology. v. 106 v. 61
Some people do believe that all students entering university should choose the courses that they have a passion for. While some argue that it would be better for students to be forced into certain key subject areas. Accordingly, my point of both views will be discussed in detail. On the one hand, there are various reasons why people believe that universities should only offer subjects that will be useful in the future. Initially, allowing students to select the subject they are fascinated about could motivate them to perform well in study. Moreover, this could help them significantly in discovering their true passion, as well as paving the road to pursue higher education. Secondly, if students at university study subjects according to their future, it is more likely for them to get employed as soon as possible. Whenever they enter the job market, employers will demand them at higher wages right after their graduation. On the other hand, science and technology are becoming really essential in this modern world. That is one of the reasons that makes people think that subjects such as medicine, hi-tech, and engineering will be useful in the future. From a personal perspective, these courses provide more job opportunities, careers, high salaries and become successful. Furthermore, the concentration on science and technology will be an important contribution to economic development. This is evident by the fact that many companies nowadays require programming languages as mandatory skills and they hire students who are proficient in those skills so it becomes easier to find jobs for those who learn future demanding skills. In conclusion, although it might seem sensible for universities to focus only on the most useful subjects, the students should study whatever they like because they will have great passion and motivation to continue studying and do their best.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
do believe that all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
entering
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
should choose the courses that they have a passion for. While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
argue that it would be better for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to
be forced
into certain key
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
areas.
Accordingly
, my point of both views will
be discussed
in detail.

On the one hand, there are various reasons why
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
offer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
that will be useful in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
.
Initially
, allowing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to select the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
they
are fascinated
about could motivate them to perform well in study.
Moreover
, this could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them
significantly
in discovering their true passion,
as well
as paving the road to pursue higher education.
Secondly
, if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
study
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
according to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
, it is more likely for them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
employed as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
as possible. Whenever they enter the job market, employers will demand them at higher wages right after their graduation.

On the other hand
, science and technology are becoming
really
essential in this modern world.
That is
one of the reasons that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
such as medicine, hi-tech, and engineering will be useful in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
. From a personal perspective, these courses provide more job opportunities, careers, high salaries and become successful.
Furthermore
, the concentration on science and technology will be an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
contribution to economic development. This is evident by the fact that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
nowadays require programming languages as mandatory
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
skills and
they hire
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
who are proficient in those
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
it becomes easier to find jobs for those who learn
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
demanding
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
.

In conclusion
, although it might seem sensible for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
to focus
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
on the most useful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
should study whatever they like
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they will have great passion and motivation to continue studying and do their best.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes
One language sets you in a corridor for life. Two languages open every door along the way.
Frank Smith

IELTS essay Some people think that all university students should study whatever they like. Others believe that they should only be allowed to study subjects that will be useful in the future, such as those related to science and technology. v. 106 v. 61

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
302 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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