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Some people think that all university students should study whatever they like. Others believe that they should be allowed to study subjects that will be useful in the future, such as those related to science and technology. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. v.11

Some people think that all university students should study whatever they like. Others believe that they should be allowed to study subjects that will be useful in the future, such as those related to science and technology. v. 11
Many people believe that it is optional for university students to choose their majors. By contrast, others think that subjects such as science and technology, which are expected to be valuable in the future should be students’ choices. This essay will discuss both viewpoints; however, I am more in favour of the former opinion. There are reasons why people hold a belief that students should select core subjects to study in university. In sectors which will expect accelerating trends in the future such as technology, there are plenty of job opportunities and career prospects. Students who choose to study these subjects will therefore stand a better chance of being employed and no worries have to be made on the problem of unemployment after graduation, which is a pressing problem most graduates have to encounter these days. However, I am of the opinion that students should independently make their own choices of courses to study. First and foremost, when they are allowed to choose what they like, they will learn the subject with more passion, which leads to greater learning efficiency. Take students majoring in art as an example. In art lesson, definitely all of them will show their dedication in the subject and acquire the knowledge effortlessly. In contrast, when it comes to Mathematic lessons, it is obvious that students’ depressing attitude and a lack of concentration is expressed throughout the lessons. What is more, trends in the future can change erratically so it is impossible to be sure what skills may be handy in the future. Therefore, students should believe in their choices and pursue them steadfastly. In conclusion, although some subjects might be practical in the future, it seems to me that trends are unpredictable and students should have no hesitation in selecting subjects of their own favourites in order to generate as much enthusiasm in learning as possible.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that it is optional for university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to choose their majors. By contrast, others
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
such as science and technology, which are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
expected
to be valuable in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
should be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students’
choices. This essay will discuss both viewpoints;
however
, I am more in
Possible spelling mistake. 'favour' is British English.
favour
of the former opinion.

There are reasons why
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
hold a belief that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
should select core
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
to study in university. In sectors which will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
expect
accelerating trends in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
such as technology, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plenty
of job opportunities and career prospects.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Students
who choose to study these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
will
therefore
stand a better chance of
being employed
and no worries
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
be made
on the problem of unemployment after graduation, which is a pressing problem most graduates
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
encounter these days.

However
, I am of the opinion that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
should
independently
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
choices of courses to study.
First
and foremost, when they are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
to choose what they like, they will learn the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
with more passion, which leads to greater learning efficiency. Take
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
majoring in art as an example. In art lesson, definitely all of them will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
their dedication in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
and acquire the knowledge
effortlessly
.
In contrast
, when it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
to Mathematic lessons, it is obvious that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students’
depressing attitude and a lack of concentration
is expressed
throughout the lessons.
What is more
, trends in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
erratically
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
it is impossible to be sure what
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
may be handy in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
.
Therefore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
should believe in their choices and pursue them
steadfastly
.

In conclusion
, although
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
might be practical in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
, it seems to me that trends are unpredictable and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
should have no hesitation in selecting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
of their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
Possible spelling mistake. 'favourites' is British English.
favourites
in order to generate as much enthusiasm in learning as possible.
10Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
21Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes
Language comes first. It’s not that language grows out of consciousness, if you haven’t got language, you can’t be conscious.
Alan Moore

IELTS essay Some people think that all university students should study whatever they like. Others believe that they should be allowed to study subjects that will be useful in the future, such as those related to science and technology. v. 11

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
311 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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