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Some people think that all universities students should study whatever they like. Others believe that they should only be allowed to study subjects that will be useful in the future, such as those related to science and technology. Discuss both these views v.2

Some people think that all universities students should study whatever they like. Others believe that they should only be allowed to study subjects that will be useful in the future, such as those related to science and technology. 2
The ways to orient a students to have a well-paid jobs in the future have been a controversial issue, leading to the divergence of opinion on the subjects that they need to study in their universities. While some opinion that students should limit their subjects on some helpful one such as science or technology, I am inclined to the view that they should have liberty at choosing their favorite subjects. There appear to be some reasons for the choices of limited useful field studied in universities. First and foremost, learning in specific subjects that are necessary in the labor market may possibly open more job opportunities in student’s career path. One good illustration of this is students who graduated from science and technology universities with their excellent knowledge and research may have a well-paid jobs in suitable working environment due to the proliferation of technology. Additionally, orientating students making their choice on useful subjects which are completely potential provides abundant labor force, which solves the issues related to scare talents in some developing business fields. Notwithstanding the aforementioned discussions, my view is that it had better that students should be allowed to make their own decisions on their preferred educational programs. Studying with highly motivation as well as passion may generally advocate students put much efforts and try their best to achieve high-colored results. As a result, they would be more aware of their responsibility for not only their learning progress but also their prospect to commit to community and society. Furthermore, with the rapid growth of cutting-edge technology and modern life, it is difficult to predict exactly the potential trend of field that students should register to study. In addition, each person would have their own strengths and ability to be good at some distinct aspects of life. If they study in diverse subjects, it could balance the demand of market for labors with high expertise. In conclusion, for all arguments I mentioned above, it appears to me that the way to make decisions for some subjects in universities, albeit there are some potential ones that lead to wide job opportunities in the future, is suggested that learners have right to choose for a variety of subjects at their disposal. In general, orienting children from early stage to have them explore their strengths and find their preference play an important role in each person’s cognitive development.
The ways to orient a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to have a well-paid
Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean "job"?
jobs
in the future have been a controversial issue, leading to the divergence of opinion on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
that they need to study in their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
. While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
opinion that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
should limit their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
on
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
helpful one such as science or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
, I
am inclined
to the view that they should have liberty at choosing their favorite subjects.

There appear to be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
reasons for the choices of limited useful field studied in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
.
First
and foremost, learning in specific
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
that are necessary in the labor market may
possibly
open more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
opportunities in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student’s
career path. One
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
illustration of this is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
who graduated from science and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
with their excellent knowledge and research may have a well-paid
Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean "job"?
jobs
in suitable working environment due to the proliferation of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
.
Additionally
, orientating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
making their choice on useful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
which are completely potential provides abundant labor force, which solves the issues related to scare talents in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
developing business fields.

Notwithstanding the aforementioned discussions, my view is that it had better that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
should be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
decisions on their preferred educational programs. Studying with
highly
motivation
as well
as passion may
generally
advocate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
put
Use "many" with countable nouns.
much
efforts and try their best to achieve high-colored results.
As a result
, they would be more aware of their responsibility for not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
their learning progress
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
their prospect to commit to community and society.
Furthermore
, with the rapid growth of cutting-edge
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
and modern life, it is difficult to predict exactly the potential trend of field that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
should register to study.
In addition
, each person would have their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
strengths and ability to be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
at
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
distinct aspects of life. If they study in diverse
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
, it could balance the demand of market for labors with high expertise.

In conclusion
, for all arguments I mentioned above, it appears to me that the way to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
decisions for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
, albeit there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
potential ones that lead to wide
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
opportunities in the future,
is suggested
that learners have right to choose for a variety of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
at their disposal.
In general
, orienting children from early stage to have them explore their strengths and find their preference play an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
role in each person’s cognitive development.
11Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
27Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people think that all universities students should study whatever they like. Others believe that they should only be allowed to study subjects that will be useful in the future, such as those related to science and technology. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
397 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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