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Some people think public's health is responsible to government while others think people should be responsible for their own health

Some people think public's health is responsible to government while others think people should be responsible for their own health YyEdj
It is normal to have opinions on this kind of general topic. Some people will think government should be responsible for their health and others do not. So, in this essay I will discuss both views and give my opinion fairly on each side of the story. There are ample of reasons for every one to feel they should be responsible for their own. In that way the may be more responsible and accountable to their nation and for those as well. Things like getting illness may happen due to unawareness of having good food and better conditions. But, end of the day they all got lessons from what they did to which position they are in. From them I totally believe they all can overcome and lead better life. Although there are multiple reasons for citizens to care themselves, getting the support from officials is also important. Like having an idea of how to intake best nutrients and vitamins to have good energy in us. The workouts to boost our immunity levels and to be in good shape also help. The other critical for best conditions are cleanliness. Making ourselves and the surroundings clean should be done. Giving the education on medication. For example: If anyone got any disease for instance malaria, typhoid or anything, the proper medicine could be taken by consulting a doctor from near by rather than making own decision. Funds for operations should also be provided by the authority who can not afford them. In conclusion, although taking or making the priorities help us to be best of us help. I am of the point that who rules the government could help and afford some money for better practices as well as good learning tips on how to be.
It is normal to have opinions on this kind of general topic.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should be responsible for their health
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
and others
do not.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, in this essay I will discuss both views and give my opinion
fairly
on each side of the story.

There are ample of reasons for every one to feel they should be responsible for their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
. In that way the may be more responsible and accountable to their nation and for those
as well
. Things like getting illness may happen due to unawareness of having
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
food and better conditions.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of the day they all
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
lessons from what they did to which position they are in. From them I
totally
believe they all can overcome and lead better life.

Although there are multiple reasons for citizens to care themselves, getting the support from officials is
also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
. Like having an
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
of how to
A determiner is probably missing here: "intake the best".
intake best
nutrients and vitamins to have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
energy in us. The workouts to boost our immunity levels and to be in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
shape
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
. The other critical for best conditions are cleanliness. Making ourselves and the surroundings clean should
be done
. Giving the education on medication.
For example
: If anyone
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
any disease
for instance
malaria, typhoid or anything, the proper medicine could
be taken
by consulting a doctor from
Did you mean "nearby"?
near by
rather
than making
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
decision. Funds for operations should
also
be provided
by the authority who can not afford them.

In conclusion
, although taking or making the priorities
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
us to be best of us
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
. I am of the point that who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
could
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
and afford
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
money for better practices
as well
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
good
learning tips on how to be.
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IELTS essay Some people think public's health is responsible to government while others think people should be responsible for their own health

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
294 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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