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Some people think planning future is a waste of time and people should focus on the present. To what extent do you agree or disagree? v.2

Some people think planning future is a waste of time and people should focus on the present. v. 2
It is true that planning for the future is a crucial part of every human life. While some say concentrating on the present is practical, I would argue that having clear strategies for the times ahead is far more advantageous for people to taste the fruit of success. Undoubtedly, creating a master plan for the future keeps a person motivated and ambitious throughout his or her life. In other words, a person with clear career goals have to exert themselves and put a lot of efforts to achieve these objectives. For example, students who want to become a scientist must widen their knowledge in Scientific, Maths, Physics, and other subjects during high school years in order to pass the admission tests for further academic courses. Hence, people having a strategy for the future are likely to reach their goals easier than those who do not formulate their own plans. Moreover, planning carefully for the days ahead encourages an individual to save a great deal of money when it comes to possessing something valuable or saving for a rainy day. For instance, if a person have a proposal for running a business, they will need a certain amount of capital which must be collected gradually from now on. Likewise, the savings will help them tide over any financial crises that they may face in the future. Thus, planning to save money will address the needs of finance in time to come. In conclusion, although there are people who claim that dealing with things at the moment is better than preparing plans for the future, I believe that future planning does more wonders in terms of making one’s ambitions and saving money for pursuing their goals.
It is true that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
planning
for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
is a crucial part of every human life. While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
say concentrating on the present is practical, I would argue that having
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
strategies for the times ahead is far more advantageous for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to taste the fruit of success.

Undoubtedly
, creating a master plan for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keeps
a person motivated and ambitious throughout
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
his or her
life.
In other words
, a person with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
career goals
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
exert themselves and put
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
efforts to achieve these objectives.
For example
, students who want to become a scientist
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
widen their knowledge in Scientific,
Possible spelling mistake. 'Maths' is British English.
Maths
, Physics, and other subjects during high school years in order to pass the admission
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tests
for
further
academic courses.
Hence
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
having a strategy for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
are likely to reach their goals easier than those who do not formulate their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
plans.

Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
planning
carefully
for the days ahead encourages an individual to save a great deal of money when it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
to possessing something valuable or saving for a rainy day.
For instance
, if a person have a proposal for running a business, they will need a certain amount of capital which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be collected
gradually
from
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
on.
Likewise
, the savings will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them tide over any financial crises that they may face in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
.
Thus
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
planning
to save money will address the needs of finance in time to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
.

In conclusion
, although there are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who claim that dealing with things at the moment is better than preparing plans for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
, I believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
future
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
planning
does more wonders in terms of making one’s ambitions and saving money for pursuing their goals.
13Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
10Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people think planning future is a waste of time and people should focus on the present. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
284 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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