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Some people think money spent in developing technology for space exploration is not justified. There are more beneficial ways to spend this money. To what extend do you agree or disagree. v.1

Some people think money spent in developing technology for space exploration is not justified. There are more beneficial ways to spend this money. v. 1
Nowadays, parents have the options of sending their children to single-sex schools or mixed schools and it is thought that children attending single-sex schools will face some problems in the future. In my opinion, I completely agree with this point of view. It is obviously that children going to single-sex schools will not only lose out on communication skills with other gender but also the ability to consider something from different angles when they grow up. Firstly, students who learning in gender specific schools have fewer interactions with the opposite sexuality. This can be a challenge for them in their future because they will definitely have to work in a unisexual working environment where teamwork with people of the opposite gender is indispensable. Furthermore, it would have a negative impact on their performance as well as that of others since they are lack of experience of understanding and interacting with the other gender. Moreover, co-ed schools help to reduce the prejudice against the opposite sex because boys will find that a girl can be as brave as any boy and that gossiping is also common among boys. Secondly, co-educational school is beneficial for children as they expose them to different viewpoints. Since male and female have varied perspectives on issues and it results in the difference of handling scenarios. Co-education allows children to have opportunities to be involved in and gain an understanding of the opposite gender's opinions. For example, it was statistically proven in an educational journal in Nigeria in 2012 that most versatile youth in their respective places of employment are products of the mixed gender academy, they also tend to have stable emotions no matter the pressure from the opposite sex. In conclusion, even though parents these days tend to send their child to single-sex schools due to the future’s drawbacks of unisexual schools, I believe there is a lot to be gained by enrolling their children in a co-ed school such as improving mutual understanding with their opposite sex counterparts and the faculty of thought and reason.
Nowadays, parents have the options of sending their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to single-sex
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
or mixed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
and it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
attending single-sex
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
will face
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
problems in the future. In my opinion, I completely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this point of view. It is
obviously
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
going to single-sex
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
will not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
lose out on communication
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
with other gender
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
the ability to consider something from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
angles when they grow up.

Firstly
, students who learning in
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
gender specific
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
have fewer interactions with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
opposite
sexuality. This can be a challenge for them in their future
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they will definitely
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
work in
Use "an" instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
a
Possible spelling mistake found.
unisexual
working environment where teamwork with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
opposite
gender is indispensable.
Furthermore
, it would have a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impact on their performance
as well
as that of others since they are lack of experience of understanding and interacting with the other gender.
Moreover
, co-ed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the prejudice against the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
opposite
sex
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
boys will find that a girl can be as brave as any boy and that gossiping is
also
common among boys.

Secondly
, co-educational
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
is beneficial for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
as they expose them to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
viewpoints. Since male and female have varied perspectives on issues and it results in the difference of handling scenarios. Co-education
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allows
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to have opportunities to
be involved
in and gain an understanding of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
opposite
gender's opinions.
For example
, it was
statistically
proven in an educational journal in Nigeria in 2012 that most versatile youth in their respective places of employment are products of the mixed gender academy, they
also
tend to have stable emotions no matter the pressure from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
opposite
sex.

In conclusion
,
even though
parents these days tend to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
send
their child to single-sex
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
due to the future’s drawbacks of
Possible spelling mistake found.
unisexual
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
, I believe there is a lot to
be gained
by enrolling their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
in a co-ed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
such as improving mutual understanding with their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
opposite
sex counterparts and the faculty of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
and reason.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
Language is wine upon the lips. – Virginia WoolfInspirational quotes for language learners
Virginia Woolf

IELTS essay Some people think money spent in developing technology for space exploration is not justified. There are more beneficial ways to spend this money. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
341 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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