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Some people think it is good to listen to music while they are studing

Some people think it is good to listen to music while they are studing 0EjmQ
Many people think that listening to music will help them study better, they feel in a better mood to be ready to tackle the homework assigned, on the contrary, many people think that when they listen to music, they are often distracted. and didn't focus to do anything, there was a debate going on around that, I quite agree with the first point. First of all, according to researchers, when listening to music, the human brain will produce substances that stimulate excitement in the central nervous system, helping other parts of the body work quickly and flexibly. , that helps most people who are in a bad mood when listening to music feel better to do something, Listening to music is also applied in psychotherapy for people who are mentally damaged and unstable about the nervous system, it eases some of the burden they have to bear, for example, Peter Parker is a person who is psychologically hurt when listening to Ari Chan's music, he gradually feels joy through The lyrics are full of joy and dynamic to focus more, many students often choose to listen to soft music to study better, which proves the magic of music. On the contrary, many people think that listening to music is something very terrible when they work or study, they often tend to find quiet places to study more, they think that when studying, absolute focus helps them get their work done faster each day, they find it natural instead of listening to music and singing along to the lyrics without working, for example, Tony Stank said that I often finish all the work quickly when in a quiet place, he considers listening to music is not necessary to help his mood better when working. In conclusion, listening to music while studying and working is a novelty that can be applied to improve one's concentration, but do not take advantage of listening to music to be lazy without working in the present.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
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think
that listening to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
them
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
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better
, they feel in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
mood to be ready to tackle the homework assigned,
on the contrary
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
that when they listen to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
, they are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
often
distracted.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
and
didn't focus to do anything, there was a debate going on around that, I quite
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the
first
point.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, according to researchers, when listening to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
, the human brain will produce substances that stimulate excitement in the central nervous system, helping other parts of the body
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
quickly
and
flexibly
.
Loose punctuation mark.
,
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
helps
most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who are in a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
mood when listening to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
feel
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
to do something, Listening to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
is
also
applied in psychotherapy for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who are mentally damaged and unstable about the nervous system, it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
eases
If the text is a generality, 'of the' is not necessary. Did you mean "some"?
some of the
burden they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
bear,
for example
, Peter Parker is a person who is
psychologically
hurt when listening to
Possible spelling mistake found.
Ari
Chan's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
, he
gradually
feels joy through The lyrics are full of joy and dynamic to focus more,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
students
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
often
choose to listen to soft
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
, which proves the magic of music.

On the contrary
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
that listening to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
is something
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
terrible when they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
, they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
often
tend to find quiet places to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
study
more, they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
that when studying, absolute focus
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
helps
them
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
done faster each day, they find it natural
instead
of listening to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
and singing along to the lyrics without working,
for example
, Tony Stank said that I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
often
finish all the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
quickly
when in a quiet place, he considers listening to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
is not necessary to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
his mood
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
when working.

In conclusion
, listening to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
while studying and working is a novelty that can
be applied
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
one's concentration,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
do not take advantage of listening to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
music
to be lazy without working in the present.
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IELTS essay Some people think it is good to listen to music while they are studing

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
330 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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