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Some people think high-end technology can prevent and cut down the rate of committing crime. Do you agree or disagree? v.5

Some people think high-end technology can prevent and cut down the rate of committing crime. v. 5
People mindset has been changes and now they do not afraid from committing crime, and due to the fact crimes are increasing day by day. People think that use of the technology can help them to stop and slow down the rate of committing crime and I support this view because of people will fear that they can get caught and it reduces the long trails of cases. To start with, Firstly, People commit crime and repeat this again and again because they have the mindset that they can escape. Previously, people commit crime and runaway without any footprints. They hide in places where nobody knows them and start a new life which makes their mindset that they escape. But uses of the technology breaks their trust. To explain, currently the investigation team uses technology to help themselves. Due to use of technology, people afraid to get caught which helps them to change their mindset and result of this crime rate is reduced. To illustrate with an example, according to a survey from The Times of India, The crime rate has been reduced to 25 percent after uses of technologies. One another essential point is justice delayed. People commit crime and have the mindset that delayed their cases can help them to escape. But uses of technology are helping in reducing this time. Trail with Video conferencing are classical example of this. Previously, People commit crime and hide in different cities and states. Even after they get caught, it takes months to transfer their cases or make in person available to the court where the crime actually happened. But now, Police authority uses technology to get rid of such problems. Trail with video conferencing is one such example where commuter does not need to present in-person, To illustrate with an example, according to a survey from The Times of India, The crime rate has been reduced to 25 percent after uses of technologies. To conclude, People have ill mindset that thinks they can escape after committing some kind of crimes, but technology breaks this mindset of people and helps authority to reduce crime rates.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mindset
has been
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
they do not
The usual collocation for "afraid" is "of" not "from". Did you mean "afraid of"?
afraid from
committing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
, and due to the fact
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
are increasing day by day.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
use
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
and slow down the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
of committing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
and I support this view
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will fear that they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
caught and it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduces
the long trails of cases.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
with,
Firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
commit
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
and repeat this again and again
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they have the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mindset
that they can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
escape
. Previously,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
commit
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
and runaway without any footprints. They
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hide
in places where nobody knows them and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
a new life which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mindset
that they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
escape
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
uses
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
breaks their trust. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
,
currently
the investigation team
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
uses
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
themselves. Due to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
use
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
afraid to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
caught which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
helps
them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mindset
and result of this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
. To illustrate with an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
example
, according to a survey from The Times of India, The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
has been
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
to 25 percent after
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
uses
of technologies.

One another essential point is justice delayed.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
commit
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
and have the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mindset
that delayed their cases can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
them to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
escape
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
uses
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
are helping in reducing this time. Trail with Video conferencing are classical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
example
of this. Previously,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
commit
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hide
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
cities and states. Even after they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
caught, it takes months to transfer their cases or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
in person available to the court where the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
actually happened.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
, Police authority
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
uses
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
rid of such problems. Trail with video conferencing is one such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
example
where commuter does not need to present in-person, To illustrate with an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
example
, according to a survey from The Times of India, The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
has been
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
to 25 percent after
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
uses
of technologies.

To conclude
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
have ill
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mindset
that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thinks
they can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
escape
after committing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
kind of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
breaks this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
mindset
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
helps
authority to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rates
.
4Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
67Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people think high-end technology can prevent and cut down the rate of committing crime. v. 5

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
354 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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