Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Some people suggest that it is wrong to give money to beggars asking for money on the street while others think that it is the right thing to do Which point of view do you think is correct and why v.2

Some people suggest that it is wrong to give money to beggars asking for money on the street while others think that it is the right thing to do Which point of view do you think is correct and why v. 2
In modern societies, there are always some needy people who stay on streets and ask people for money, the beggars. There is a hot topic of debate between people that should we give beggars money or not. Some people hold the idea that it is a selfish act to ignore them, while others believe that giving them money is not a wise way of helping them. Although it is a highly controversial topic, for me the latter opinion carries more weight. In the following I will elaborate on why I support this idea. The foremost reason why I am supporting this idea lies in the fact that giving beggars money would encourage them to continue this habit. I believe that everyone has the talent and ability to find a job and make money. But if we give them money without asking them to do a job we actually send them a signal that you can get an easy money, a money that you did not work for it. I believe that this is not a correct way of helping people. Last week I read in newspaper that in a study conducted by a group of researchers they found out that most of beggars in the long time end up an alcoholic and irresponsible person. Thus, by giving them an easy money not only we do not help them, but also we push them to become an irresponsible person. Another subtle point that I should deem is the fact that giving them money is not a permanent solution for their problem. If we really care for them and want to help them we should help them to find a job. For example, when I was a kid, one day I was out with my dad and a poor mom came to us and asked for money to buy food for her kids. My father did not give her money, instead he bought food for her and gave her a ride to her home. After he saw the real life of the family, he found a job for her and sent her kids to school. Right now, that family are a middle class family and all of the kids ended up with academic education. If my father gave that woman money he might helped her to feed her kids but their problem would still be with them unsolved. Therefore, the best way of helping someone is finding a way to solve their real problem, such as giving them a job. Due to the aforementioned argument explored in the previous statements I believe that no one should give beggars money because it will encourage a bad habit and it does not do any good in long term.
In modern societies, there are always
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
needy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who stay on streets and ask
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
beggars
. There is a hot topic of debate between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
that should we
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
give
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
beggars
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
or not.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
hold the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
that it is a selfish act to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ignore
them, while others
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
giving
them
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
is not a wise way of helping them. Although it is a
highly
controversial topic, for me the latter opinion carries more weight. In the following I will elaborate on why I support this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
.

The foremost reason why I am supporting this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
lies in the fact that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
giving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
beggars
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
would encourage them to continue this habit. I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that everyone has the talent and ability to find a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
if we
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
give
them
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
without asking them to do a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
we actually
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
send
them a signal that you can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
an easy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
that you did not work for it. I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that this is not a correct way of helping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. Last week I read in newspaper that in a study conducted by a group of researchers they found out that most of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
beggars
in the long time
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
up an alcoholic and irresponsible person.
Thus
, by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
giving
them an easy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
we do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
we push them to become an irresponsible person.

Another subtle point that I should deem is the fact that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
giving
them
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
is not a permanent solution for their problem. If we
really
care for them and want to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them we should
In informal texts, 'to' is not necessary. Do you mean "help them find"?
help them to find
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
.
For example
, when I was a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kid
, one day I was out with my dad and a poor mom came to us and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
asked for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
food for her
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kids
. My father did not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
give
her
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
,
instead
he
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bought
food for her and gave her a ride to her home. After he
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
saw
the real life of the family, he found a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
job
for her and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sent
her
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kids
to school. Right
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
, that family are a middle
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
family and
Consider using "all the".
all of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kids
ended up with academic education. If my father gave that woman
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
he might
The verb 'might' requires the base form of the verb: "help"
helped
her to feed her
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
kids
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
their problem would
still
be with them unsolved.
Therefore
, the best way of helping someone is finding a way to solve their real problem, such as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
giving
them a job.

Due to the aforementioned argument explored in the previous statements I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that no one should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
give
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
beggars
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it will encourage a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
habit and it does not do any
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
in long term.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
46Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people suggest that it is wrong to give money to beggars asking for money on the street while others think that it is the right thing to do Which point of view do you think is correct and why v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
454 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts