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Some people suggest that doing same things in life is good. While other say making changes is beneficial. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people suggest that doing same things in life is good. While other say making changes is beneficial. RwalY
Masses have a divided opinion on whether individual should make changes in their life or not. As, certain people like to do similar work in whole life, while, others suggest that changing things is beneficial. In my perspective people should make changes according to time. This essay will discuss both viewpoints along with a possible conclusion. To commence with former view, doing same things makes masses perfect in their profession. In other words, if any person is performing any activity from a long time then he will gain too much experience and knowledge about their work. Which helps them to boost their productivity and creativity. As a result, then a chance of mistakes in his work are very low. Moreover people feel more comfortable and satisfied in same works because when they do jobs in same environment regularly then they became used to it and feel relaxed while doing their tasks. Thus, it is a liked by many individuals to avoid changes. On the other hand, people who support latter view argued that changes in our lifestyle or work is the demand of hour. To explain it, with the advancement of technology way of working and performing other tasks changed completely. Therefore, if individuals use old methods then they may stay behind the society and suffer in this era. Moreover changes also help people to earn more money. To explain it, the demand of jobs always changed according to time so if people change their work and choose more demanding tasks then they will be paid more for their efforts. Hence, changes provide a number of new opportunities to individuals. To conclude, although there are multifarious benefits of doing same things but in my viewpoint changes prove very beneficial for people, as it enhance their earnings and also help them to move forward with the society
Masses have a divided opinion on whether
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individual
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
changes
in their life or not. As, certain
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people
like to do similar
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
in whole life, while, others suggest that changing things is beneficial. In my perspective
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
changes
according to time. This essay will discuss both viewpoints along with a possible conclusion.

To commence with former view, doing same things
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
masses perfect in their profession. In
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
words, if any person is performing any activity from a long time then he will gain too much experience and knowledge about their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
. Which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
them to boost their productivity and creativity.
As a result
, then a chance of mistakes in his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
low.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Moreover
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
feel more comfortable and satisfied in same works
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
when they do jobs in same environment
regularly
Did you mean "than"?
then
they became
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to it and feel relaxed while doing their tasks.
Thus
, it is a liked by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
to avoid
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
.

On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who support latter view argued that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
changes
in our lifestyle or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
is the demand of hour. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
it, with the advancement of technology way of working and performing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
tasks
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
completely.
Therefore
, if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
methods then they may stay behind the society and suffer in this era.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Moreover
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
changes
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to earn more money. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
it, the demand of jobs always
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
according to time
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
and choose more demanding tasks
Did you mean "than"?
then
they will
be paid
more for their efforts.
Hence
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
changes
provide a number of new opportunities to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
individuals
.
To conclude
, although there are multifarious benefits of doing same things
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
in my viewpoint
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
changes
prove
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
beneficial for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, as it enhance their earnings and
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
move
forward with the
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
society
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IELTS essay Some people suggest that doing same things in life is good. While other say making changes is beneficial.

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
305 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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