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Some people says that children should teach international news and other said that it is waste of time Discuss both views

No doubt, National or international news plays a paramount role in childrens life. It is a good source of knowlegefor them. they can know what is happening around us. I believe that it is waste of time for them or may not. I feel that is balance approach for them. I will discuss both views in the upcoming paragraphs. To commence with, school should teach international news to students as a result they can get information about the other cultures and transition. How people are living in foreign countries what language they spoke. For instance, most of people in my home town is living in Canada, when they visit in my hometown theydo talking in English and French language. Old people cannot understand what they are saying. That's why few people in my hometown joined French classes for learning it. . On the other side, it wastage of time for students. Because they have not enough time, they can spend on learning international news. They can devote their time on their text books. which is more useful for them. for example if they studying in the particular what they want to become in their life. they will be indepth of knowledge. In conclusion, learning national or international news are important for students. Student give equal preference international news rather than national.
No doubt, National or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
plays a paramount role in
Possible spelling mistake found.
childrens
life. It is a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
source of
Possible spelling mistake found.
knowlegefor
them.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter.
they
can know what is happening around us. I believe that it is waste of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
for them or may not. I feel
that is
balance approach for them.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
I
will discuss both views in the upcoming paragraphs. To commence with, school should teach
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
as a result
they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
information about the other cultures and transition. How
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are living in foreign countries what language they spoke.
For instance
, most of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in my
The word “hometown” is normally spelled as one word.
home town
is living in Canada, when they visit in my hometown
Possible spelling mistake found.
theydo
talking in English and French language.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
cannot understand what they are saying. That's why few
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in my hometown
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
joined
French classes for learning it.
Don’t put a space before the full stop.
.
On the other side,
Do not use a noun immediately after the pronoun ‘it’. Use a verb or an adverb, or possibly some other part of speech.
it wastage
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
they have not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
, they can spend on learning
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
. They can devote their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
on their text books.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter.
which
is more useful for them.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter.
for
example if
A verb seems to be missing. Did you mean “they’re studying”, “they are studying”, or “they were studying”?
they studying
in the particular what they want to become in their life.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter.
they
will be
Possible spelling mistake found.
indepth
of knowledge.
In conclusion
, learning national or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Student
give equal preference
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
rather
than national.
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IELTS essay Some people says that children should teach international news and other said that it is waste of time Discuss both views

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
221 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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