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Some people say that young people today do not make good use of their leisure time and that they spend too much time inside watching television and playing video games and that they should rather spend more time outside engaging in physical activities.To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is argued that youngsters spend loads of leisure time playing computer games or watching TV programs instead of involving outside activities. From my point of view young people should spend their free time more beneficially and should use it for their advantage. Nowadays the game industry is the most popular activity among people due to a wide range of types of games. Playing computer games has several negative effects on their health issues like obesity, stress, depression or sleeping disorders. During this activity people have a lack of physical activities that leads to the overweight. Besides, the risen emotions after stressful games can impact on the dreams of slumbers or get anxiety during sleeping. The last USA research shows that 68% of gamers have health and psychological problems. Being a couch potato is an accustomed sedentary lifestyle among individuals that leads to being isolated from the world. Also, these people can’t be up to date with the latest news or may be so shy with other people, as the result they may lose conversational skills and fail their career prospects, because engaging with new people or visiting different conferences give an essential experience for their successful life. In this year the number of viewers has increased to 46% compared to the past. In conclusion, there are lots of ways to spend free time, but current statistics proves that the vast majority of people tend to spend it inside via electronic utilities. That can be so harmful and dreadful consequences in terms of their job and health.
It
is argued
that youngsters
spend
loads of leisure time playing computer
games
or watching TV programs
instead
of involving outside
activities
. From my point of view young
people
should
spend
their free time more
beneficially
and should
use
it for their advantage.

Nowadays the game industry is the most popular
activity
among
people
due to a wide range of types of
games
. Playing computer
games
has several
negative
effects on their health issues like obesity,
stress
, depression or sleeping disorders. During this
activity
people
have a lack of physical
activities
that leads to the overweight.
Besides
, the risen emotions after stressful
games
can impact on the dreams of slumbers or
get
anxiety during sleeping. The last USA research
shows
that 68% of gamers have health and psychological problems.

Being a couch potato is an accustomed sedentary lifestyle among individuals that leads to
being isolated
from the world.
Also
, these
people
can’t be up to date with the latest news or may be
so
shy with other
people
, as the result they may lose conversational
skills
and fail their career prospects,
because
engaging with new
people
or visiting
different
conferences give an essential experience for their successful life. In this year the number of viewers has increased to 46% compared to the past.

In conclusion
, there are lots of ways to
spend
free time,
but
current
statistics proves that the vast majority of
people
tend to
spend
it inside via electronic utilities. That can be
so
harmful and dreadful consequences in terms of their job and health.
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IELTS essay Some people say that young people today do not make good use of their leisure time and that they spend too much time inside watching television and playing video games and that they should rather spend more time outside engaging in physical activities.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
257 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
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  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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