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Some people say that you can learn more about another country by watching television programmes and films about it that by actually visiting it. How true is this statement? Is there anything you can learn about another country by visiting it that you cannot learn by watching programmes and films about it? v.2

Some people say that you can learn more about another country by watching television programmes and films about it that by actually visiting it. How true is this statement? Is there anything you can learn about another country by visiting it that you cannot learn by watching programmes and films about it? v. 2
Today, an increasing number of travelling programmes are being televised to show the different types of cultures around the world. People sometimes believe that it is enough watching these productions instead of visiting the country to know more about it. Personally, I partly agree with this assertion since there is a range of unexplored details that could not be seen on any television documentary. There is no doubt that you can learn such a great deal of information from a travelling programme or a documentary about a country without leaving your house. Nowadays, these kind of programmes manages helpful information where you can discover a brief summary of the history of a place and about their diverse culture such as rituals and ancient traditions. Moreover, they show you the story behind the main attractions or places that you must know. For instance, I have learned a lot about Carnival festivals which are celebrated annually in Rio de Janeiro thanks to televised shows. Nevertheless, there is countless experiences that you can obtain by visiting a country. I am convinced that travelling and speaking with inhabitants makes you understand and appreciate better other cultures. In addition, another reason is that you may have the chance to do walking tours to visit amazing unpopular places. Moreover, there is a great opportunity to try national dishes or live special experiences like eating particular meals or doing extreme sports like bungee jumping. All things considered, I strongly believe that television can help us all to know about distinct areas and regions on Earth. However, there are still undiscovered secrets that you may miss if you do not personally visit the place. My suggestion is that if you want to learn about another country, you should plan to visit and live your own experience.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Today
, an increasing number of travelling
Possible spelling mistake. 'programmes' is British English.
programmes
are
being televised
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
types of cultures around the world.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
believe that it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
watching these productions
instead
of visiting the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
to know more about it.
Personally
, I partly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this assertion since there is a range of unexplored
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
details
that could not be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
on any television documentary.

There is no doubt that you can learn such a great deal of information from a travelling
Possible spelling mistake. 'programme' is British English.
programme
or a documentary about a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
without leaving your
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
. Nowadays,
Did you mean "this kind" or "these kinds"?
these kind
of
Possible spelling mistake. 'programmes' is British English.
programmes
manages helpful information where you can discover a brief summary of the history of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
and about their diverse culture such as rituals and ancient traditions.
Moreover
, they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
you the story behind the main attractions or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
that you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
know.
For instance
, I have learned a lot about Carnival festivals which
are celebrated
annually
in Rio de Janeiro thanks to televised
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
.

Nevertheless
,
Did you mean "there are countless experiences"?
there is countless experiences
that you can obtain by visiting a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
. I
am convinced
that travelling and speaking with inhabitants
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
you understand and appreciate better other cultures.
In addition
, another reason is that you may have the chance to do walking tours to visit amazing unpopular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
.
Moreover
, there is a great opportunity to try national dishes or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
special experiences like eating particular meals or doing extreme sports like bungee jumping.

All things considered, I
strongly
believe that television can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
us all to know about distinct areas and regions on Earth.
However
, there are
still
undiscovered secrets that you may miss if you do not
personally
visit the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
. My suggestion is that if you want to learn about another
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
, you should plan to visit and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
your
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
experience.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Mistakes
You can never understand one language until you understand at least two.
Geoffrey Willans

IELTS essay Some people say that you can learn more about another country by watching television programmes and films about it that by actually visiting it. How true is this statement? Is there anything you can learn about another country by visiting it that you cannot learn by watching programmes and films about it? v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
298 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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