Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Some people say that the most important thing for being rich is people have opportunity for helping other person Do you agree or disagree v.5

Some people say that the most important thing for being rich is people have opportunity for helping other person v. 5
Some people believe that the rich have a capacity of supporting other people. In my opinion, i partly agree with this statement due to some reasons below On the one hand, it is the local have a tendency to gain enomous benificial economic advantages via higher taxes and investment in corporations from the rich. Evidently, the affluent may pay higher taxes than others who have been living under the bread line. As the result, the government could allocate this taxation for the school expansions, new hopital contructions in order to reinforce and enhance the literacy rate as well as local health protectoon. Secondy, the majority of the pople who have higher income than average one own a number of companies and multinational entreprises which creat incresing job opportunities for the domestic people. Meaning that, the lower unemployment rate comes at the expense, and then the crime rate would reduce. On the one hand, there are some drawbackd when people become rich such as work exploitation and becoming inappopriate mirros for the youth. In terms of work abuse, according to the Australia newspaper, it is recorded that international students are exploited such as working longer, being paid lower income than that in labour regulatiom, worst becoming a victim of harrasment by restauranteurs, companies. Moreover, the rich probably are not suitable mirrors for youngsters. Some the young affluent are tend to express their higher social status through postinf luxury items, world-class clothes. This can lead to the fact that some teenagers perhap whine their parents to purchase these goods by all cost, gradually children would become spoiled and posses inappropriate manners. In my conclusion, i suppose although the rich made a great contribution to social life and economic development, people should concern about itsdisadvantages.
Some
people
believe that the
rich
have a capacity of supporting other
people
. In my opinion,
i
partly
agree
with this statement due to
some
reasons
below


On the one hand, it is the local have a tendency to gain
enomous
benificial
economic advantages via higher taxes and investment in corporations from the
rich
.
Evidently
, the affluent may pay higher taxes than others who have been living under the bread line. As the result, the
government
could allocate this taxation for the school expansions, new
hopital
contructions
in order to reinforce and enhance the literacy rate
as well
as local health
protectoon
.
Secondy
, the majority of the
pople
who have higher income than average one
own
a number of
companies
and multinational
entreprises
which
creat
incresing
job opportunities for the domestic
people
. Meaning that, the lower unemployment rate
comes
at the expense, and then the crime rate would
reduce
.

On the one hand, there are
some
drawbackd
when
people
become
rich
such as work exploitation and becoming
inappopriate
mirros
for the youth. In terms of work abuse, according to the Australia newspaper, it
is recorded
that international students
are exploited
such as working longer,
being paid
lower income than that in
labour
regulatiom
,
worst
becoming a victim of
harrasment
by
restauranteurs
,
companies
.
Moreover
, the
rich
probably
are not suitable mirrors for youngsters.
Some
the young affluent are tend to express their higher social status through
postinf
luxury items, world-
class
clothes. This can lead to the fact that
some
teenagers
perhap
whine their parents to
purchase
these
goods
by all cost,
gradually
children would become spoiled and posses inappropriate manners.

In my conclusion,
i
suppose although the
rich
made a great contribution to social life and economic development,
people
should concern about
itsdisadvantages
.
2Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
10Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
24Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people say that the most important thing for being rich is people have opportunity for helping other person v. 5

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
292 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts