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Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say that there ate more important environmental problems

Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say that there ate more important environmental problems jajd
Admittedly, it is thought by some that, the major environmental issue which is facing by this era is the extinction of endangered species of plants and animals, but few others contradict the above mentioned argument. It is arguably, there is no exaggeration to say that we live in a era of developments where by the plethora of inventions have profoundly affect our day-to-day life eventhough it is dangerously affect the environment. Hence it is considered as a debatable issue today. The following paragraphs diligently scrutinise both the views and reach at a justifiable opinion of mine. On the one side of the argument, main environmental issues occurred due to the destruction of certain species of plants and animals. Those plants and animals extinct due to the over exploitation of environment by the human being. Thus, the other reasons should be considered for the environmental issues which lead to the extinction of those species. To make it more clear deforestation is the main threat to the environment. Due to the deforestation many animals and plants lose their natural habitat. Hence, it accelerates the extinction of those species. To cite an example, the recent survey showed the fact that, due to deforestation in amazon rain forest many rarely rare species of plants and animals lost their natural habitat and it start to extinct. So, the loss of particular species can't be determined as an environmental issue. The destruction of certain species of plants and animals occur as the result of some other environmental issues.
Admittedly
, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
that, the major
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issue
which is facing by this era is the extinction of endangered species of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
plants
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
few others contradict the above mentioned argument. It is
arguably
, there is no exaggeration to say that we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in
Use "an" instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
a
era of developments
Did you mean "whereby"?
where by
the plethora of inventions have
profoundly
Possible agreement error -- use past participle here: "affected".
affect
our day-to-day life
Possible spelling mistake found.
eventhough
it is
dangerously
Consider using a past participle here: "affected".
affect
the environment.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Hence
it
is considered
as a debatable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issue
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
. The following paragraphs
diligently
Possible spelling mistake. 'scrutinise' is British English.
scrutinise
both the views and reach at a justifiable opinion of mine. On the one side of the argument, main
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issues
occurred
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
due
to the destruction of certain species of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
plants
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
. Those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
plants
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
extinct
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
due
to the over exploitation of environment by the human being.
Thus
, the other reasons should
be considered
for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issues
which lead to the extinction of those species. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
it more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
deforestation is the main threat to the environment.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Due
to the deforestation
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
plants
lose their natural habitat.
Hence
, it accelerates the extinction of those species. To cite an example, the recent survey
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
the fact that,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
due
to deforestation
The usual collocation for "amazon" is "on". Did you mean "on amazon"?
in amazon
rain forest
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
rarely rare species of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
plants
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
lost their natural habitat and it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
to extinct.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, the loss of particular species can't
be determined
as an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issue
. The destruction of certain species of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
plants
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
animals
occur as the result of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issues
.
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IELTS essay Some people say that the main environmental problem of our time is the loss of particular species of plants and animals. Others say that there ate more important environmental problems

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
252 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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