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Some people say that technologies such as mobile phones are disrupting social interaction.

Some people say that technologies such as mobile phones are disrupting social interaction. l3J9
Many people consider that technologies are discrupting social interaction. But others think that technologies help in our daily life. What do you think about it? Technologies have itself advantages and disadvantages. This essay is divided into three section. It will first consider positive sides of technologies. It will then continue a discussion. Finally, some conclusions will be drawn. Some technologies are helpful for us. As an example, now new programs for education in school and learning foreign languages are popular. I heard that this programs are helping for studying and working because some people can't afford to study in special foreign cources. Also, you can read on mobile phone. You can't buy a book and spend your money for it. Because of this, I think technologies such as mobile phone, ipad or laptop become a part of our life. But there are bad sides of new technologies. Nowadays, the popular programs such as Instagram, Facebook, tiktok and another programs are killing our time for watching funny videos. Also, technologies such as mobile phone is spoiling our eyesight. It is one more negative side of new technologies. It essay tells us that new technologies have their positive and negative sides. I can say that I like use a mobile phone for my education but sometimes I can't hold on of watching videos in the Internet. To draw the conclusion I can say that everybody has his or her own opinion. I advise you use technologies for benefits in your life and don't for games which don't help you in your education and work.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
consider that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technologies
are
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discrupting
social interaction.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
others
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that
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technologies
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
in our daily life. What do you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
about it?
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Technologies
have itself advantages and disadvantages. This essay
is divided
into three
Possible agreement error. The noun 'section' seems to be countable, so consider using: "sections".
section
. It will
first
consider
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
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sides
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technologies
. It will then continue a discussion.
Finally
,
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some
conclusions will
be drawn
.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technologies
are helpful for us. As an example,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
programs
for education in school and learning foreign languages are popular. I heard that
Did you mean "these"?
this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
programs
are helping for studying and working
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
can't afford to study in special foreign
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cources
.
Also
, you can read on mobile
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phone
. You can't
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
a book and spend your money for it.
Because of this
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technologies
such as mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
ipad
or laptop become a part of our life.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
there are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sides
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
technologies.

Nowadays, the popular
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
programs
such as Instagram, Facebook,
Possible spelling mistake found.
tiktok
and another
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
programs
are killing our time for watching
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
funny
videos.
Also
,
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technologies
such as mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
is spoiling our eyesight. It is one more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
side of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
technologies.

It
Did you mean "essays"?
essay
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tells
us that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technologies
have their
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sides
. I can say that I like
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
a mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
for my education
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
I can't hold on of watching videos
The usual collocation for technology is "on," not "in." It is better to say this: "on the Internet".
in the Internet
.

To draw the conclusion I can say that everybody has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
his or her
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
opinion. I advise you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technologies
for benefits in your life and don't for games which don't
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
you in your education and work.

IELTS essay Some people say that technologies such as mobile phones are disrupting social interaction.

Essay
  American English
6 paragraphs
262 words
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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