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Some people say that private schools should be banned because they give students an unfair advantage over others. To what extend do you agree or disagree? Give your opinion and include relevant examples from your own experience

The quality of school is of paramount importance in shaping a child’s future in today’s competitive edge. Schools are the source of imparting knowledge and developing talent in children. Some people assert that infants who study from private schools have an upper hand over those who study in government aided school and ergo these schools should be eradicated. However, I strongly oppose this notion. This essay will provide reasons that support this view. To begin with, despite huge number of funding made to public schools, they are unable to maintain the much-needed quality and standards to enable students develop competitive and cognitive skills. One of the major reasons is lack of commitment and accountability in teachers and their casual approach towards imparting quality education. The low-income families face the heat of this drawback as they are unable to afford private schools. In contrast, private schools are run as private organisations due to the cut-throat competition in the field. They are well aware of the fact that they will be out of the business if they do not maintain good quality in their schools because of which they take rigorous efforts in recruiting well trained teachers. These teachers are paid heavily to devote their substantial time in imparting knowledge and developing cognitive skills and talent along with academical success. For example, I have seen parents saving enormous amounts to ensure that they can afford good schools for their children as public schools do not the required standard, which in turn has led to increase in private schools in cities. To conclude, it is the right of every child to receive quality education irrespective of the source. Banning private schools will in-turn deprive them of these privileges, instead government should adopt measures to improve their educational system to cater to the public demand.
The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
is of paramount importance in shaping a child’s future in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
’s competitive edge.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Schools
are the source of imparting knowledge and developing talent in children.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
assert that infants who study from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
private
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
have an upper hand over those who study in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
aided
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
and ergo these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
should
be eradicated
.
However
, I
strongly
oppose this notion. This essay will provide reasons that support this view.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, despite huge number of funding made to public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
, they are unable to maintain the much-needed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
and standards to enable students develop competitive and cognitive
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
. One of the major reasons is lack of commitment and accountability in teachers and their casual approach towards imparting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
education. The low-income families face the heat of this drawback as they are unable to afford
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
private
schools.

In contrast
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
private
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
are run
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
private
Possible spelling mistake. ‘organisations’ is British English.
organisations
due to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cut
-throat competition in the field. They are well aware of the fact that they will be out of the business if they do not maintain
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
in their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of which they take rigorous efforts in recruiting
This word is normally spelled with a hyphen.
well trained
teachers. These teachers
are paid
heavily
to devote their substantial time in imparting knowledge and developing cognitive
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
and talent along with academical success.
For example
, I have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
parents saving enormous amounts to ensure that they can afford
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
for their children as public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
do not the required standard, which in turn has led to increase in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
private
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
in cities.

To conclude
, it is the right of every child to receive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
quality
education irrespective of the source. Banning
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
private
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
schools
will in-turn deprive them of these privileges,
instead
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should adopt measures to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
their educational system to cater to the public demand.
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IELTS essay Some people say that private schools should be banned because they give students an unfair advantage over others. Give your opinion and include relevant examples from your own experience

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
301 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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