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Some people say that parents have the most important role in a child development however as a argue that other think like television or friends have a more significant influence is cause both views and give your opinion.

Some people say that parents have the most important role in a child development however as a argue that other think like television or friends have a more significant influence is cause both views and give your opinion. pbYdd
On the other hand, social media and friends influence in negative ways sometimes. First and foremost reason behind is that children learn and observe from television and friends. For example, they watch crime shows content and it gives some adverse effect on child's mind, as they follow on useful content in order to child may do crime in their life namely, murder, rape, pin pocket, physical violence with other. Consequently, it gives negative effect on child mentally. However, some people think that parents are always helping to give in a right direction and I agree. In other words, parents have a depth of knowledge regarding their life experience and they give their children. Which consequently result, children could learn what is right and wrong in their life and also this lesson will assist to take right decision in children's life. If, for example, parents are teaching that children about respect for elders, helping to need need people, never hurt anyone, co-operate with everyone and so on. because of these, child will become all rounder in later life. Furthermore, parents take care as well as protecting towards his child. As a result, they solve problems and help to take a major decision for their child. In conclusion, it seems to me that parents are play a significant role in his children's development, it means they provide good life lessons as well as good knowledge which help in future Although one gets social media and friends are the main influence in the later. I support the former owing to Parents give better knowledge besides more protecting their child.
On the other hand
, social media and friends influence in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
ways
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
.
First
and foremost reason behind is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
learn and observe from television and friends.
For example
, they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
crime
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
content and it
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gives
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
adverse effect on child's mind, as they follow on useful content in order to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
may do crime in their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
namely
, murder, rape, pin pocket, physical violence with other.
Consequently
, it
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gives
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effect on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
mentally.
However
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
are always helping to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
give
in a right direction and I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
.
In other words
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
have a depth of knowledge regarding their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
experience and
they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
give
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
. Which
consequently
result,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
could learn what is right and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
in their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
and
also
this lesson will assist to take right decision in children's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
. If,
for example
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
are teaching that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
about respect for elders, helping to
Possible typo: you repeated a word
need need
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
, never hurt anyone, co-operate with everyone and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of these,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
will become
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
all rounder
in later
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
Furthermore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
take care
as well
as protecting towards his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
.
As a result
, they solve problems and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
to take a major decision for their child.

In conclusion
, it seems to me that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
are play a significant role in his children's development, it means they provide
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
lessons
as well
as
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
knowledge which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
in future Although one
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
gets
social media and friends are the main influence in the
Did you mean "latter" (=the second of two items)?
later
. I support the former owing to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Parents
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
give
better knowledge
besides
more protecting their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
child
.
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IELTS essay Some people say that parents have the most important role in a child development however as a argue that other think like television or friends have a more significant influence is cause both views and give your opinion.

Essay
  American English
2 paragraphs
266 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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