Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

some people say that our use of new media is making us stupid. However, others claim that our use of new media is preparing us for the future

some people say that our use of new media is making us stupid. However, others claim that our use of new media is preparing us for the future PE5GX
Technological advent has been the greatest impact on our daily life so social media has emerged as a phenomenon in this day and age. Some people insist that the methods we access to the media may make users shortsighted. Whilst, others consider that innovative broadcasting is utterly the underlay of citizen’s bright futures. In this essay, I am going to analyze the upsides and downsides and I advocate with the latter due to the countless benefits it creates. The way we operating the Internet is the main factor that does harm to our daily life. It crosses our mind that teenagers are the age in which they are prone to addict to the virtual world. Since children at the age of 15 spend a considerable amount of time to video games so it is undeniable that they suffer from insomnia and deteriorated physical condition, which leads them to poor academic performance. Moreover, bad news dominates the headlines will make people approach frequent negative news day by day that leads to worsening mental health such as become stressed and obsessed with the real world. In all, these are two disadvantages of the media that we may be unconscious about it. On the contrary, new media is the cornerstone of infant development and contributes substantially to the betterment of the innovative life. When it comes to a baby's mature progress, it is mandatory that children be exposed to the mass of media to aid their cognitive skills to the surroundings. A case in point is the sooner the kids listen to English songs in their initial phase, the more effortless way they study English in elementary and higher education. In addition, the news is the fast and accurate means of conveying information to the community in this tense situation of the epidemic as it offers insight into the number of patient cases, which enables us to prepare for the near future. In conclusion, I strongly believe that new media is the best means of communication with every aspect of life but it depends on the purpose and the way we use the Internet connections and social media.
Technological advent has been the greatest impact on our daily
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
has emerged as a phenomenon in this day and age.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
insist that the methods we access to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
users shortsighted. Whilst, others consider that innovative broadcasting is
utterly
the underlay of citizen’s bright futures. In this essay, I am going to analyze the upsides and downsides and I advocate with the latter due to the countless benefits it creates.

The way
Did you mean "we're operating", "we are operating", or "we were operating"?
we operating
the Internet is the main factor that does harm to our daily
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
. It crosses our mind that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
are the age in which they are prone to addict to the virtual world. Since children at the age of 15 spend a considerable amount of time to video games
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
it is undeniable that they suffer from insomnia and deteriorated physical condition, which leads them to poor academic performance.
Moreover
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
dominates the headlines will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
approach frequent
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
day by day that leads to worsening mental health such as become
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stressed
and obsessed with the real world. In all, these are two disadvantages of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
that we may be unconscious about it.

On the contrary
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
is the cornerstone of infant development and contributes
substantially
to the betterment of the innovative
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
. When it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
to a baby's mature progress, it is mandatory that children
be exposed
to the mass of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
to aid their cognitive
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
to the surroundings. A case in point is the sooner the kids listen to English songs in their initial phase, the more effortless way they study English in elementary and higher education.
In addition
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
is the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
and accurate means of conveying information to the community in this tense situation of the epidemic as it offers insight into the number of patient cases, which enables us to prepare for the near future.

In conclusion
, I
strongly
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
is the best means of communication with every aspect of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it depends on the purpose and the way we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
the Internet connections and social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS essay some people say that our use of new media is making us stupid. However, others claim that our use of new media is preparing us for the future

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
355 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts