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Some people say that it is possible to tell a lot about a person’s culture and character from their choice of clothes. Do you agree or disagree? v.14

Some people say that it is possible to tell a lot about a person’s culture and character from their choice of clothes. v. 14
Some people are of the opinion that the way peoples' choice to dress could provide us with insights into others' personality and cultural background. Having said that, however, I disagree with the given assertion on the basis of some compelling justification and in this essay, I am going to explain my reasons in detail. To begin with, one of the chief reasons is that the outfits that people wear are not always come from their choices. That is to say, many people do not have any options for their clothes due to some established conventions existing in some countries. Take Iran, which is an Islamic country, as an illustration, in this country all women have to wear hijab otherwise they could get punished; therefore, it is not easy to grasp an individual's character from their clothes. In addition, another reason that could account for it is that nowadays because of globalization, people endeavour to keep abreast of the fashion world. To put it another way, the more they are interested in branded clothes, the less they would wear their local customs. A recent study conducted in Paris has shown that because of the high demand for branded clothes, that outfit that people wear are not a reflection of their culture. All things considered, although it may be possible to find out about one's character and culture from their clothes, I personally take the view that it is highly unlikely to learn about a person from their attire.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are of the opinion that the way peoples' choice to dress could provide us with insights into others' personality and cultural background. Having said that,
however
, I disagree with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
assertion on the basis of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
compelling justification and in this essay, I am going to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
my reasons in detail.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, one of the chief reasons is that the outfits that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wear
are not always
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
from their choices.
That is
to say,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do not have any options for their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
clothes
due to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
established conventions existing in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
countries. Take Iran, which is an Islamic country, as an illustration, in this country all women
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wear
hijab
otherwise
they could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
punished;
therefore
, it is not easy to grasp an individual's character from their clothes.

In addition
, another reason that could account for it is that nowadays
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of globalization,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
Possible spelling mistake. 'endeavour' is British English.
endeavour
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
abreast of the fashion world. To put it another way, the more they
are interested
in branded
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
clothes
, the less they would
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wear
their local customs. A recent study conducted in Paris has shown that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the high demand for branded
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
clothes
, that outfit that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wear
are not a reflection of their culture.

All things considered, although it may be possible to find out about one's character and culture from their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
clothes
, I
personally
take the view that it is
highly
unlikely to learn about a person from their attire.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
13Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people say that it is possible to tell a lot about a person’s culture and character from their choice of clothes. v. 14

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
247 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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