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Some people say that holding sport competitions can cause problems for the host country. Others disagree. Discuss both views and give your opinion. v.2

Some people say that holding sport competitions can cause problems for the host country. Others disagree. v. 2
Nations worldwide competes to host an international sport occurrence. There is a controversy about its complications and benefits. On one hand, people believe that hosting such event can enhance their economy and they support it. On the other hand, individuals are more concern about their environment and resources. This easement will discuss the both sides and my own opinion. To begin, the most significant argument that used to encourage hosting international sport competitions are economical. Countries can take advantage of such event to make profits. For example, tourism in the host country can be promoted during the event Attractive sites and nature can used through the aids targeting sports fan. Moreover, because local businesses can participate, citizen's income can be increased. Beside the financial positive outcome, the country can showcase their culture; the world can expose to their national values and traditions. However, conservative individuals argue that hosting a physical activity competition can be a waste of resources. Welcoming a large number of people requires money and hard work. Such as elements can be used by the government on other important needs for the public. In addition, damaging environments can occur due to the new construction and the population. This pollution affects the locals. In conclusion, for most people hosting popular international matches by their country is a dream. This dream may face a number of real consequences if not considering its side effect and prevent it. In my view, there are various serious withdrawals that can be produced by this gathering that cannot be avoided.
Nations worldwide competes to host an international sport occurrence. There is a controversy about its complications and benefits. On one hand,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hosting
such
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
event
can enhance their
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
economy and
they support it.
On the other hand
, individuals are more concern about their environment and resources. This easement will discuss the both sides and my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
opinion.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
, the most significant argument that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to encourage
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hosting
international sport competitions are economical.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Countries
can take advantage of such
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
event
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
profits.
For example
, tourism in the host
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
can
be promoted
during the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
event
Attractive sites and nature can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
through the aids targeting sports fan.
Moreover
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
local businesses can participate, citizen's income can
be increased
. Beside the financial
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
outcome, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
can showcase their culture; the world can expose to their national values and traditions.

However
, conservative individuals argue that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hosting
a physical activity competition can be a waste of resources. Welcoming
Specify a number, remove phrase, or simply use "many" or "numerous"
a large number of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
requires money and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
work. Such as elements can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
by the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
on other
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
needs for the public.
In addition
, damaging environments can occur due to the new construction and the population. This pollution affects the locals.

In conclusion
, for most
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hosting
popular international matches by their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
is a dream. This dream may face a number of real consequences if not considering its side effect and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevent
it. In my view, there are various serious withdrawals that can
be produced
by this gathering that cannot
be avoided
.
8.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people say that holding sport competitions can cause problems for the host country. Others disagree. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
256 words
8.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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