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Some people say that due to the growing number of unfit and overweight people sport should be made compulsory in all educational establishments. Others claim that only voluntary decision to do sport helps people to be fit, but compulsory physical education embarrasses and turns away students who don't like sport. Give your opinion and support it with relevant examples.

Some people say that due to the growing number of unfit and overweight people sport should be made compulsory in all educational establishments. Others claim that only voluntary decision to do sport helps people to be fit, but compulsory physical education embarrasses and turns away students who don't like sport. Give your opinion and support it with relevant examples. qOXd
These days there are two main points of view about the introduction of the sports discipline into the curriculum. While some people consider sport as a mandatory subject in the educational system, others suggest such an approach increases the pressure on the student’s, forcing them to be engaged in sport against their will. I believe that sport shouldn’t be an obligatory subject and students should be free for making their own choice with regards to this question. Firstly, it is impossible to force students to do sports against their will, because it could worsen their attitude to this subject. Despite attending sport classes, their hate for sport could increase under these circumstances and it could affect their future preferences. The pressure and the lack of positive reinforcement could induce them to reject the sport in their future. Thus, the number of overweight people will be increased. Moreover, a good promotion of the well-being provided by sport and a free choice could increase student’s interest in this subject, accelerating a number of people who select sport by themselves. If people make a personal decision to do sports, they will not reject it for a long time. It is easier to stick to your own decision, than to do something against your will. For instance, in plenty of Russian schools there is a bad attitude to sports classes and students don’t consider this subject as an important thing. Thus, they skip the lessons very often and try to get a doctor's permission which allows them to ignore sport classes. In conclusion, I think that it is inappropriate to introduce sport’s subjects as an obligatory, because it doesn’t resolve the problem of the increasing number of unfit people, while the free sport classes will encourage students to improve themselves.
These days there are two main points of view about the introduction of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
discipline into the curriculum. While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
consider
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
as a mandatory
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
in the educational system, others suggest such an approach increases the pressure on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student’s
, forcing them to
be engaged
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
against their will. I believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
shouldn’t be an obligatory
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
should be free for making their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
choice
Use "in regard to", "with regard to", or more simply "regarding".
with regards to
this question.

Firstly
, it is impossible to force
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to do
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
against their will,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it could worsen their attitude to this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
. Despite attending
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
classes, their hate for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
could increase
under these circumstances
and it could affect their future preferences. The pressure and the lack of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
reinforcement could induce them to reject the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
in their future.
Thus
, the number of overweight
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will
be increased
.

Moreover
, a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
promotion of the well-
being provided
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
and a free choice could increase
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student’s
interest in this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
, accelerating a number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who select
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
by themselves. If
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a personal decision to do
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
, they will not reject it for a long time. It is easier to stick to your
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
decision, than to do something against your will.
For instance
, in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plenty
of Russian schools there is a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
attitude to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
classes and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
don’t consider this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
as an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
thing.
Thus
, they skip the lessons
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
and try to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a doctor's permission which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allows
them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ignore
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
classes.

In conclusion
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that it is inappropriate to introduce
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
as an obligatory,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it doesn’t resolve the problem of the increasing number of unfit
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, while the free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
classes will encourage
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
themselves.
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IELTS essay Some people say that due to the growing number of unfit and overweight people sport should be made compulsory in all educational establishments. Others claim that only voluntary decision to do sport helps people to be fit, but compulsory physical education embarrasses and turns away students who don't like sport. Give your opinion and support it with relevant examples.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
296 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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  • Some people say that due to the growing number of unfit and overweight people sport should be made compulsory in all educational establishments. Others claim that only voluntary decision to do sport helps people to be fit, but compulsory physical education embarrasses and turns away students who don't like sport. Give your opinion and support it with relevant examples.