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Some people say that children no longer need to go to school since everything can now be learned online.To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some people say that children no longer need to go to school since everything can now be learned online. with this statement? 3a3bm
Some people believe that children can learn everything online and it is unnecessary to attend school for learning. I do not agree with this idea, in my opinion, although online learning has some advantages, what it can teach children is limited and there are more things that in person learning can do. It is no doubt that advanced technologies have made it possible to study from home, and it is a definitely useful tool when it comes to having difficult situations to attend school such as a current global pandemic due to COVID19 and some health conditions that some children may have. On the other hand, there are some possible concerns about the online teaching methods. In traditional classrooms, teachers can give face-to-face feedback immediately to students who are experiencing difficulties, while online learning has a tendency to overlook the problems. It is certain that students can have a part of education online, however it is required some improvements and efforts in order to maintain the same quality learning as in class learning. Top of that, I believe that school years are the time that children are supposed to learn how to communicate, share and cooperate with people in order to develop efficient communicating skills to build great relationships with others when they have grown up. Speaking of communicating skills, when we communicate with people face-to-face, we do see their facial reactions, voice tones and body movements which help us to understand how the person feels, however it is hard through the screen. In conclusion, new technologies have been beneficial to an education system, however there are some issues that need to be dealt with, therefore it is still early to make a decision whether children can switch to a complete online learning or not.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
can learn everything
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
and it is unnecessary to attend school for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
. I do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
, in my opinion, although
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
advantages, what it can teach
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
is limited
and there are more things that in person
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
can do.

It is no doubt that advanced technologies have made it possible to study from home, and it is a definitely useful tool when it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
to having difficult situations to attend school such as a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
global pandemic due to
Did you mean "COVID-19" or the alternative spelling "Covid-19" (= coronavirus)?
COVID19
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
health conditions that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
may have.

On the other hand
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
possible concerns about the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
teaching methods. In traditional classrooms, teachers can give face-to-face feedback immediately to students who are experiencing difficulties, while
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
has a tendency to overlook the problems.

It is certain that students can have a part of education
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
,
however
it
is required
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
improvements and efforts in order to maintain the same quality
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
as in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
learning.

Top of that, I believe that school years are the time that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
are supposed
to learn how to communicate, share and cooperate with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
in order to develop efficient communicating
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
to build great relationships with others when they have grown up. Speaking of communicating
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
, when we communicate with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
face-to-face, we do
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
their facial reactions, voice tones and body movements which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
us to understand how the person feels,
however
it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
through the screen.

In conclusion
, new technologies have been beneficial to an education system,
however
there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
issues that need to
be dealt
with,
therefore
it is
still
early to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a decision whether
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
can switch to a complete
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
or not.
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IELTS essay Some people say that children no longer need to go to school since everything can now be learned online. with this statement?

Essay
  American English
6 paragraphs
295 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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