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Less Television, Less Violence and Aggression

Less Television, Less Violence and Aggression pR2Dw
Television has a negative impact for many people, especially for children that are more aggressive than their friends. It can be improved from The study from Dr. Thomas Robinson about reduced usage on television, videos, and video games in two places is San Jose, California, elementary school children and the Stanford University School of medicine. They make two groups, first some children have many times to watch or play, use television and video games, respectively. Second, they did things differently, like having limited time by using television and video games. The result from this method is very different between both of two groups. Children that use television are more aggressive than their peers. However, many studies improve that children who watch a lot of TV can likely act violently. It can be their behavior by spending time with television, video games, and video. For instance, the teachers from the intervention school included the program in their existing curriculum, their purpose is to motivate them to limit those activities on their own by using media. There are two Center wall flavors which is the study by Dr. Brandon S. In United States and Canada murder rates climb 10 to 15 years after the introduction of television. The other tested is in South Africa, the murder rate had rose 130 percent in 1974 research by Dr. Robinson. It happened because people spend more time to watch TV more that how supposed to. The best solution is to turn it off.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Television
has a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impact for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
,
especially
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
that are more aggressive than their friends. It can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
from The study from Dr. Thomas Robinson about
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
usage on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
videos
, and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
video
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
in two places is San Jose, California, elementary school
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
and the Stanford University School of medicine. They
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
two groups,
first
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some
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children
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
times
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
or play,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
video
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
,
respectively
. Second, they did things
differently
, like having limited
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
by using
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
video
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
. The result from this method is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
between both of two groups.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Children
that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
are more aggressive than their peers.

However
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
studies
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
TV can likely act
violently
. It can be their behavior by spending
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
video
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
, and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
video
.
For instance
, the teachers from the intervention school included the program in their existing curriculum, their purpose is to motivate them to limit those activities on their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
by using media.

There are two Center wall flavors which is the study by Dr. Brandon S. In United States and Canada murder rates climb 10 to 15 years after the introduction of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
. The other
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tested
is in South Africa, the murder rate had
Use the past participle "risen" after the modal (auxiliary) verb 'had'.
rose
130 percent in 1974 research by Dr. Robinson. It happened
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
spend more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
TV more that how supposed to. The best solution is to turn it off.
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IELTS essay Less Television, Less Violence and Aggression

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
248 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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