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Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it.

Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it. DQQ6
Advertisements are an active component of our lives as they are displayed almost everywhere. There are people that, because of this reason, believe that they are no more effective to influence buyers choices as we do not focus our attention on them anymore. On the other hand, others find them still quite powerful in redirecting people's consumeristic needs. Personally, i stand with this last category of thinkers as i think that advertisements are still successful in pushing people to buy every kind of products. Those who believe that we do not watch anymore advertisements, take as an example Youtube videos. Even if sometimes they are stuffed with tons of advertising pauses, as soon as people can skip them, they just do it, no matter what products has been promoted. Besides that, nowadays consumers have the perception that behind a product that is strongly advertised, there is a powerful company but not always a quality product, so they will not pay that much of attention to whatever is displayed on the advertisement, considering it a possible spam. However, I do not believe that the previous arguments stand up to a scrutiny as the influence that advertisements exerts on our choices, is self-evident to everybody. Most of the people, as soon as holidays arrive, will fall in the festival shopping trap, as they will be brainwashed by specific holidays advertisements that they need to purchase seasonal merchandise. Moreover, a recent study has proven that because of advertisements showed in specific part of the day when housewives are considered more active, a boom in the purchasing of kitchen utensils occurred. I believe that these arguments support with enough strength the fact that, due to advertisements influence, we still tend to buy things that, before watching them, we did not even know to want. In conclusion I find disillusioned believe that we have already escaped to the consumeristic cycle initiated and took alive by advertisements.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Advertisements
are an active component of our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
as they
are displayed
almost everywhere. There are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
that,
because of this
reason,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that they are no more effective to influence buyers choices as we do not focus our attention on them anymore.
On the other hand
, others find them
still
quite powerful in redirecting
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's
Possible spelling mistake found.
consumeristic
needs.
Personally
,
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
stand with this last category of thinkers as
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisements
are
still
successful in pushing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
every kind of products.

Those who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that we do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
Make sure that 'anymore' is used as an adverb, not as an adjective. Did you mean "any more"?
anymore
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisements
, take as an example
Possible spelling mistake found.
Youtube
videos. Even if
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
they
are stuffed
with tons of advertising pauses, as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can skip them, they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
do it, no matter what products
Possible agreement error. You should probably use: "have", "haven".
has
been promoted
.
Besides
that, nowadays consumers have the perception that behind a product
that is
strongly
advertised, there is a powerful
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not always a quality product,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they will not pay that much of attention to whatever
is displayed
on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
, considering it a possible spam.

However
, I do not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that the previous arguments stand up to a scrutiny as the influence that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisements
exerts on our choices, is self-evident to everybody. Most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
as holidays arrive, will fall in the festival shopping trap, as they will
be brainwashed
by specific holidays
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisements
that they need to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
seasonal merchandise.
Moreover
, a recent study has proven that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisements
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
in specific part of the day when housewives
are considered
more active, a boom in the purchasing of kitchen utensils occurred.

I
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that these arguments support with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
strength the fact that, due to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisements
influence, we
still
tend to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
things that,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
watching them, we did not even know to want. In
The comma is probably missing here: "conclusion, I".
conclusion I
find disillusioned
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
believe
that we have already escaped to the
Possible spelling mistake found.
consumeristic
cycle initiated and took alive by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisements
.
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IELTS essay Some people say that advertising is extremely successful at persuading us to buy things. Other people think that advertising is so common that we no longer pay attention to it.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
321 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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