Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

some people say that advertising encourages us to buy things we really do not need. Others say that advertisements tell us about new products that may improve our lives. Which view point do you agree with? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

It is generally agreed that advertisement makes people buy unnecessary things. However, I am inclined to believe that it is mandatory to know new products in the market which can influence our lives. In this essay, I will justify my opinion using relevant supporting evidence and examples. One way to support my viewpoint is that a lot of new products that will ease our life and cater to our daily needs are coming to the market. The advertisement for such products will make us more aware of their benefits which will lead to the right call to either buy or not. For example, if I want to buy a certain product, I will start searching for it using different options like google or enquiring friends, but if I see an advertisement for the product, my search will be much easier. Another way to justify my opinion is that, when we first see a product in the market, without seeing an advertisement before, we mostly won’t tend to buy it. That is, many people do not like to try new things. On the contrast, if you have seen an advertisement of a product several times, you will automatically become familiar with it and you will want to try it and see how it works. However, mass advertising can lead to people paying attention to things they don’t care about. They contaminate people minds and make them buy thing that are unnecessary to them, because they have been convinced that it will make them happier or successful etc… In conclusion, although there are some arguments against advertisement, as outlines briefly above, I believe these are outweighed by the arguments in favor. Ultimately, every person has his own scale of values.
It is
generally
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agreed
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
makes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
unnecessary things.
However
, I
am inclined
to believe that it is mandatory to know new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
in the market which can influence our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
. In this essay, I will justify my opinion using relevant supporting evidence and examples.

One way to support my viewpoint is that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
that will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ease
our life and cater to our daily needs are coming to the market. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
for such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
us more aware of their benefits which will lead to the right call to either
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
or not.
For example
, if I want to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
a certain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
, I will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
searching for it using
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
options like google or
Possible spelling mistake. ‘enquiring’ is British English.
enquiring
friends,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
if I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
, my search will be much easier.

Another way to justify my opinion is that, when we
first
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
in the market, without seeing an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
, we
mostly
won’t tend to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
it.
That is
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do not like to try new things. On the contrast, if you have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
an
The usual collocation for “advertisement” is “for”, not “of”. Did you mean “advertisement for”?
advertisement of
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
product
several times, you will
automatically
become familiar with
Use a comma before ‘and’ if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
it and
you will want to try it and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
how it works.

However
, mass advertising can lead to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
paying attention to things they don’t care about. They contaminate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
If ‘people’ is plural here, don’t use the third-person singular verb.
minds
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
them
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
thing that are unnecessary to them,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they have
been convinced
that it will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
them happier or successful etc…

In conclusion
, although there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
arguments against
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
, as outlines
briefly
above, I believe these
are outweighed
by the arguments in favor.
Ultimately
, every person has his
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
scale of values.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS essay some people say that advertising encourages us to buy things we really do not need. Others say that advertisements tell us about new products that may improve our lives. Which view point do you agree with? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
288 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts