Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

It's immensely critical to optimize the schools' curriculum in the way that benefits students the most.

It's immensely critical to optimize the schools' curriculum in the way that benefits students the most. Henceforth, schools ought to opt the most relevant and useful subjects in order to build an impeccable program. On the countrary, it seems that there is a visible conflict over the vitality of history courses and subjects present in the area of science and technology. In my view, importance of history shall not be underestimated, in respect to the usefulness of state of the art subjects. In other words, I believe including both subjects is a key merit for a successful program. There is a lot to debate over the crucial role of the history in our lives. History of each country is a delegation from their past, which resembles their ideology, beliefs and moral values and chronological alterations of these matters. Consequently, considering history an obsolete subject and being not familiar with it, even at the basic levels, would possibly result in pupils indigent in term of humanities. Thus, we must anticipate a society full of inept enigineers and physicians if we reject the importance of history education. In addition, science and technology are responsible to provide life needs and answer to everyday urges. In the present era that technologies are expediating with a pace far away from our imaginations, it doesn't seem reasonable to omit these courses from schools completely. However, student are much more exhorted and curious about science and technology, which is in contrast to history. As a result, these sorts of courses might be considered as extracurricular educations in light of avid enthusiasm of today's children about technologies. To sum up, future rocket scientists even need to be familiar with their history, which is in fact, their identity. On the other hand, learning adequate amounts of science and technology is also necessary. Due to the fact that history might be as impotant as natural sciences for instance, schools shall not set it aside.
It's
immensely
critical to optimize the schools' curriculum in the way that benefits students the most. Henceforth, schools ought to opt the most relevant and useful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
in order to build an impeccable program. On the
Possible spelling mistake found.
countrary
, it seems that there is a visible conflict over the vitality of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
courses and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
present in the area of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
. In my view, importance of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
shall not
be underestimated
, in respect to the usefulness of
Did you mean “state-of-the-art”?
state of the art
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
.
In other words
, I believe including both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
is a key merit for a successful program.

There is a lot to debate over the crucial role of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
in our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
History
of each country is a delegation from their past, which resembles their ideology, beliefs and moral values and chronological alterations of these matters.
Consequently
, considering
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
an obsolete
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
and being not familiar with it, even at the basic levels, would
possibly
result in pupils indigent
Did you mean the commonly used phrase “in terms of”?
in term of
humanities.
Thus
, we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
anticipate a society full of inept
Possible spelling mistake found.
enigineers
and physicians if we reject the importance of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
education.

In addition
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
are responsible to provide life needs and answer to everyday urges. In the present era that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technologies
are
Possible spelling mistake found.
expediating
with a pace far away from our imaginations, it doesn't seem reasonable to omit these courses from schools completely.
However
, student are much more exhorted and curious about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
, which is
in contrast
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
.
As a result
, these sorts of courses might
be considered
as extracurricular educations in light of avid enthusiasm of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
's children about technologies.

To sum up, future rocket scientists even need to be familiar with their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
, which is in fact, their identity.
On the other hand
, learning adequate amounts of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
science
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
is
also
necessary. Due to the fact that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
history
might be as
Possible spelling mistake found.
impotant
as natural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sciences
for instance
, schools shall not set it aside.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS essay It's immensely critical to optimize the schools' curriculum in the way that benefits students the most.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
324 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts