Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Some people say that advertising encourages us to buy things that we really do not need. Others say that advertisements tell us about new products that may improve our lives. Which viewpoint do you agree with?

Advertising plays a pivotal role in influencing the purchasing decision of a consumers buying behaviour. Where on one hand some believe it leads us to buying needless things, on the other hand, a few believe advertising educates us about new products that may positively impact our lives. This essay will argue whether advertising draws us towards unnecessary products or it keeps us updated about new products that could be beneficial to us. In today’s world advertising has taken over our lives significantly; such that it persuades us to buy even those products that are not essential to us. While, modern advertising targets the emotional quotient, it also tries to lure consumers by way of attaining monetary gains out of it. For instance, after looking at an ‘End of Season Sale’ advertisement a person decided to go shopping and buy two particular things that were required, but on seeing the discounts on variety of other things went ahead and added four more products to the cart. Therefore, advertising makes people impulsively buy many products that may not currently require. Advertising is an effective means of communication through which consumers can be well informed about the latest products available. They contain all the information to help a buyer to make sound buying decisions. It helps them to compare and differentiate between two or more similar products. For Example, an individual is planning to buy a washing machine; it is because of advertisements that they can compare the features, functions and pricing of the various models available and make the most appropriate purchase. Hence, advertising is very helpful while making purchase decisions. This essay argued why some people think advertisements make us take hasty purchase decisions whereas some others think that it might enhance lives by keeping them well informed about new products. In my opinion advertising is an extremely important tool of communication in today’s times which helps us improve our quality of life.
Advertising plays a pivotal role in influencing the purchasing decision of
Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean "a consumer" or simply "consumers"?
a consumers
buying
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
. Where on one hand
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
believe it leads us to buying needless things,
on the other hand
, a few believe advertising educates us about new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
that may
positively
impact our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
. This essay will argue whether advertising draws us towards unnecessary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
or it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keeps
us updated about new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
that could be beneficial to us.

In
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
’s world advertising has taken over our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
significantly
; such that it persuades us to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
even those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
that are not essential to us. While, modern advertising targets the emotional quotient, it
also
tries to lure consumers by way of attaining monetary gains out of it.
For instance
, after looking at an ‘
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
End
of Season Sale’ advertisement a person decided to go shopping and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
two particular things that
were required
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
on seeing the discounts on variety of other things went ahead and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
added
four more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
to the cart.
Therefore
, advertising
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
makes
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
impulsively
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
that may not
currently
require.

Advertising is an effective means of communication through which consumers can be
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
well informed
about the latest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
available. They contain all the information to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
a buyer to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
sound buying decisions. It
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
them to compare and differentiate between two or more similar
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
.
For Example
, an individual is planning to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
buy
a washing machine; it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of advertisements that they can compare the features, functions and pricing of the various models available and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
the most appropriate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
.
Hence
, advertising is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
helpful while making
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
decisions.

This essay argued why
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
advertisements
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
make
us take hasty
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
decisions whereas
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
others
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that it might enhance
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
by keeping them
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
well informed
about new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
products
. In my opinion advertising is an
extremely
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
tool of communication in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
’s times which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
us
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
our quality of life.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS essay Some people say that advertising encourages us to buy things that we really do not need. Others say that advertisements tell us about new products that may improve our lives. Which viewpoint do you agree with?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
322 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts