Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Please share with us something that either you or someone else is proud of you for doing. It would be impossible for us to ask questions that include everyone's talents, achievements, or successes. We want to give everyone the opportunity to share about themselves. Why is this something that you or someone else is proud of you for doing?

My biggest achievement so far is getting selected on a prestigious scholarship which is fully sponsored by the U. S Department of State. Kennedy Lugar Youth Exchange and Study scholarship is a 10 month high school exchange and study program to the United States. Every year around 40 students get selected from India and I was selected in the 2018-2019 batch. The selection process commenced at the start of my 10th grade and took around 11-12 months. The application process had a number of lenghty forms that were needed to be filled, numerous vaccination requirements, english language tests and a couple of panel interviews. I was the only boy selected from my school along with 4 other girls and also was the only boy selected from my state along with 6 other girls. Since, the scholarship results came out in the month of February, my 10th grade final results weren't out yet. In order to confirm my selection, I was also required to perform well in the State board(10th grade) exams. Fortunately, I scored 9. 3 out of 10 in it and apart from confirming the KLYES scholarship, I was also among the top 5 school toppers. In addition, after coming back from the exchange program, I scored 96% in my Intermediate Board exams(11th grade) and was the 2nd topper of my college. Moreover, in my exchange year, apart from participating and doing well in all the three seasonal sports. I also participated in the Individual speech event conducted by the Iowa High School Speech Association. I took part in the After dinner category and made it to the performing category in the All State Speech Festival, which is the highest level. My parents are proud of my achievements and I strive everyday to make sure I become a son of whom they are proud off. The immense effort, hardwork and the amount of time they have invested in me is something that I can never pay back. And watching me grow as a good individual by learning the values that they have taught me is also something that makes them very proud and happy.
My biggest achievement
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
far is getting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
selected
on a prestigious
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
scholarship
which is
fully
sponsored by the U. S Department of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
State
. Kennedy Lugar Youth
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Exchange
and Study
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
scholarship
is a
When a number forms part of an adjectival compound, use hyphens: "10-month-high"
10 month high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exchange
and study program to the United
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
States
. Every year around 40 students
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
selected
from
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
India and
I was
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
selected
in the 2018-2019 batch. The selection process commenced at the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
of my 10th
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
grade
and took around 11-12 months. The application process had a number of
Possible spelling mistake found.
lenghty
forms that
were needed
to
be filled
, numerous vaccination requirements,
Possible spelling mistake found.
english
language
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tests
and a couple of panel interviews. I was the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
boy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
selected
from my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
along with 4 other girls and
also
was the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
boy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
selected
from my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
state
along with 6 other girls.

Since, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
scholarship
results came out in the month of February, my 10th
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
grade
final results weren't out
yet
. In order to confirm my selection, I was
also
required to perform well in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
State
board(10th
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
grade)
exams.
Fortunately
, I scored 9. 3 out of 10 in it and apart from confirming the
Possible spelling mistake found.
KLYES
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
scholarship
, I was
also
among the top 5
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
toppers.
In addition
, after coming back from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exchange
program, I scored 96% in my Intermediate Board exams(11th
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
grade)
and was the 2nd topper of my college.

Moreover
, in my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
exchange
year, apart from participating and doing well in all the three seasonal sports. I
also
participated in the Individual speech
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
event
conducted by the Iowa High
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
School
Speech Association. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
took part
in the After dinner category and made it to the performing category in
Possible typo. Did you mean "the" or "All"?
the All
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
State
Speech Festival, which is the highest level.

My parents are proud of my achievements and I strive
'Everyday' is an adjective. Did you mean "every day"?
everyday
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
sure I become a son of whom they are proud off. The immense effort,
Possible spelling mistake found.
hardwork
and the amount of time they have invested in me is something that I can never pay back. And watching me grow as a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
individual by learning the values that they have taught me is
also
something that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
them
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
proud and happy.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS essay Please share with us something that either you or someone else is proud of you for doing. It would be impossible for us to ask questions that include everyone's talents, achievements, or successes. We want to give everyone the opportunity to share about themselves. Why is this something that you or someone else is proud of you for doing?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
355 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts