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Some people say that advertising encourages us to buy things that we really do not need. Others say that advertisements tell us about new products that may improve our lives. Which viewpoint do you agree with? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Some people say that advertising encourages us to buy things that we really do not need. Others say that advertisements tell us about new products that may improve our lives. Which viewpoint do you agree with? 15noG
In this era, advertisement becomes a crucial part of everyone's life. Some masses think that advertisements enforce us to buy those things we don't need in our daily life whereas, others think through advertisements we have a good chance to change our lives. It seems to me that both points are true, in the following paragraphs, I will discuss the reasons and relevant examples. First and foremost, the way of advertisements, For instance, advertisement people show us a new instrument in a different way even though it works like other instruments. My aunt bought a new grinder which looks beautiful than she had before in her house but it works like an old grinder. So, she just wasted money on that product, she could invest that money on other very important things. On the flip side, advertisement is a source of knowledge such as we are aware of new technology. For example, I had a laptop that was very slow in processing sometimes I had to wait for 10 minutes for every single task. Lucky, I was suffering social site during that I found a new SSD drive which is 10 times faster than my old drive. So in such a way advertisement is a really good way to get knowledge as well as we are aware of new tread that goes in markets. Overall, it depends on the situation and people because sometimes we really need things that we don't have and we are not aware of things, but sometimes we just attract by looking at things even we don't need those.
In this era,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
becomes a crucial part of everyone's life.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
masses
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisements
enforce us to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
those things we don't need in our daily life whereas, others
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
through
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisements
we have a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
chance to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
. It seems to me that both points are true, in the following paragraphs, I will discuss the reasons and relevant examples.

First
and foremost, the way of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisements
,
For instance
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
us a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
instrument in a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
way
even though
it works like other instruments. My aunt
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bought
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
grinder which looks
Use "(beautiful)" to make a comparison with this adjective.
beautiful
than she had
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
in her
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it works like an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
grinder.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, she
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
wasted money on that product, she could invest that money on other
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
things.

On the flip side,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
is a source of knowledge such as we are aware of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
technology.
For example
, I had a laptop that was
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
slow in processing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
I had to wait for 10 minutes for every single task. Lucky, I was suffering social site during that I found a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
SSD drive which is 10 times faster than my
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
drive.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
in such a way
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advertisement
is a
really
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
way to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
knowledge
as well
as we are aware of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
new
tread that goes in markets.

Overall
, it depends on the situation and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
we
really
need things that we don't
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
have and
we are not aware of things,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
we
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
attract by looking at things even we don't need those.
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IELTS essay Some people say that advertising encourages us to buy things that we really do not need. Others say that advertisements tell us about new products that may improve our lives. Which viewpoint do you agree with?

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
263 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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