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some people said that it is prime duty of government of developing countries to provide basic amenities such as health,education. Give your opinion.

some people said that it is prime duty of government of developing countries to provide basic amenities such as health, education. Give your opinion. jRVpX
People elect the governmet for providing different comforts at low cost. So, its prime duty of government to provide basic amenities to citizens that includes health, education, clothing, food and shelter. However, some people belive that the governing body of developed countries should help developing countries to mitigate these isses rapidly, I however agree with former view, there are number argument to support my opinion. Firstly, Government should make primary education compulsory as result people become more litrate they can enhance their standard of living by earing sufficent amount of money. This leads to crime free society for instance in many countries primary education is free because of that they have higher literacy rates. Secondly, every one knows that health is wealth. If people is healthy enough they can concentrate more on their study as well as work, government should provide primary aid at free of cost or at minimum cost. They should also encourage people to follow healthy diet and make their houses clearer from stagnent water as they are the source of different dieses. To add to it, Government also develop trade relations with other developed countries, This would possibally encourage developed countries to invest in different field of developing countries. Many of MNC companies now opening their subbranches into developing countries as result they can get workes at lower salaries. This would definatly solve unemployment problem in developing countries, so at the end this is win win situation for both. In the conclusion, I belive that it is essential for government to provide their citizens basic amenities however at some extent help for developed countries are also requird. .
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
elect the
Possible spelling mistake found.
governmet
for providing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
comforts at low cost.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, its prime duty of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
to provide basic amenities to citizens that includes health, education, clothing, food and shelter.
However
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
Possible spelling mistake found.
belive
that the governing body of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
developing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
to mitigate these
Possible spelling mistake found.
isses
rapidly
, I
however
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with former view, there are number argument to support my opinion.

Firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Government
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
primary education compulsory as result
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
become more
Possible spelling mistake found.
litrate
they can enhance their standard of living by
Possible spelling mistake found.
earing
Possible spelling mistake found.
sufficent
amount of money. This leads to crime free society
for instance
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
primary education is free
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of that they have higher literacy rates.

Secondly
, every one knows that health is wealth. If
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
is
healthy
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
they can concentrate more on their study
as well
as work,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should provide primary aid at free of cost or at minimum cost. They should
also
encourage
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to follow healthy diet and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
clearer from
Possible spelling mistake found.
stagnent
water as they are the source of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
Possible spelling mistake found.
dieses
.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
add
to it,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Government
also
develop trade relations with other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
, This would
Possible spelling mistake found.
possibally
encourage
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
to invest in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
field of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
developing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
of
Possible spelling mistake found.
MNC
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
opening their subbranches into
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
developing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
as result they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "works", the plural form of the noun 'work'?
workes
at lower salaries. This would
Possible spelling mistake found.
definatly
solve unemployment problem in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
developing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
at the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
this is
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
win win
situation for both.

In the conclusion,
Did you mean "I believe"?
I belive
that it is essential for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
to provide their citizens basic amenities
however
at
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
extent
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
are
also
Possible spelling mistake found.
requird
.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
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IELTS essay some people said that it is prime duty of government of developing countries to provide basic amenities such as health, education. Give your opinion.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
272 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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