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Some people prefer to work in the same type of job throughout their lifetime while others like to change the type of jon they do. Discuss both views and give your opinion. v.6

Some people prefer to work in the same type of job throughout their lifetime while others like to change the type of jon they do. v. 6
Job preference is usually based on a person’s choice and ability. Some people choose to stick to the same profession, however, others tend to change area of work. In this essay the viewpoints of both the statements will be mentioned along with my opinion. Primarily employees are unsatisfied, and they don’t find the current job to be very fulfilling. It is highly likely that low pay-scale is one of the factors behind this practice, furthermore, they do not like the kind of work they do. There are, for example, several candidates who enrol themselves for completely different study programs at the age of 25 or above, just because of bad career choice and unfavourable outcome. I think, it is certainly a right decision to change the line of work rather than continuing an occupation which is not very promising. On the other hand, many staff members enjoy even the monotonous task they do in office. It is evident that they are passionate about their work choice. Moreover, better income increases the retention rate. For instance, most of the organisations hire applicants at an exorbitant salary, which as a result motivates the earners. I reckon, if mankind stays longer in the same field, it will lead to personal growth and high appraisal chances. In a nutshell, it is advocated that diligence towards one's duty can definitely lead to a bright future. Career path must be chosen wisely. There is no doubt that a lucrative pay will certainly give a boost and reduce the attrition rate drastically.
Job preference is
usually
based on a person’s choice and ability.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
choose to stick to the same profession,
however
, others tend to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
area of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
. In this essay the viewpoints of both the statements will
be mentioned
along with my opinion.

Primarily
employees
are unsatisfied
, and they don’t find the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
job to be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
fulfilling. It is
highly
likely that low pay-scale is one of the factors behind this practice,
furthermore
, they do not like the kind of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
they do. There are,
for example
, several candidates who enrol themselves for completely
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
study programs at the age of 25 or above,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
career choice and
Possible spelling mistake. 'unfavourable' is British English.
unfavourable
outcome. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
, it is
certainly
a right decision to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
the line of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
rather
than continuing an occupation which is not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
promising.

On the other hand
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
staff members enjoy even the monotonous task they do in office. It is evident that they are passionate about their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
choice.
Moreover
, better income increases the retention rate.
For instance
, most of the
Possible spelling mistake. 'organisations' is British English.
organisations
hire applicants at an exorbitant salary, which
as a result
motivates the earners. I reckon, if mankind stays longer in the same field, it will lead to personal growth and high appraisal chances.

In a nutshell, it
is advocated
that diligence towards one's duty can definitely lead to a bright future. Career path
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be chosen
wisely
. There is no doubt that a lucrative pay will
certainly
give a boost and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the attrition rate
drastically
.
8.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people prefer to work in the same type of job throughout their lifetime while others like to change the type of jon they do. v. 6

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
255 words
8.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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