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Some people prefer to work as part of group, while others prefer to work independently, which do you prefer? v.1

Some people prefer to work as part of group, while others prefer to work independently, which do you prefer? v. 1
It’s becoming an increasing trend for people to ready-made meals rather than home cooked food. I believe that the demerits of this outweigh the merits, which include easy access to food and reduced stress of cooking. Admittedly, there are numerous pros associated with getting readily-prepared foods, which include; reduced stress of having to make meals after a hectic and strenuous workday. This is due to the fact that, humans by nature spend too much of gruesome hours working and making a living for themselves, therefore, are left with less time for other chores of life. For instance, an average Lagos-based adult spends up to five hours of the day in traffic, in addition to the statutory eight hours of work. This leaves not enough time for cooking and leads to them grabbing any available fast food. Nevertheless, while there are perks to getting fast meals, the effects from this, are quite injurious and negatively impart the health of individuals. For example, studies conducted by the World Health Organization clearly indicated the relationship between consumption of fast foods and high rate cardiovascular diseases. Independent studies have also linked high rate of obesity in adults to increased consumption of fatty meals, mostly ready-made foods. Hence, the positive effects of consuming home and freshly prepared cuisines can never be overemphasized, as their benefits transcend the impeccable taste derived from them and the satisfaction of making your own food. In conclusion, while there are many advantages to eating fast meals, the disadvantages, which include, increased cardiovascular diseases and obesity associated with the high fat content obviously outweigh their merits
It’s becoming an increasing trend for
people
to ready-made
meals
rather
than home cooked
food
. I believe that the demerits of this outweigh the merits, which include easy access to
food
and
reduced
stress
of cooking.

Admittedly
, there are numerous pros associated with getting
readily
-prepared
foods
, which include;
reduced
stress
of having to
make
meals
after a hectic and strenuous workday.
This is due to the fact that
, humans by nature spend too much of gruesome hours working and making a living for themselves,
therefore
, are
left
with less time for other chores of life.
For instance
, an average Lagos-based adult spends up to five hours of the day in traffic,
in addition
to the statutory eight hours of work. This
leaves
not
enough
time for cooking and leads to them grabbing any available
fast
food.

Nevertheless
, while there are perks to getting
fast
meals
, the effects from this, are quite injurious and
negatively
impart the health of individuals.
For example
, studies conducted by the World Health Organization
clearly
indicated the relationship between consumption of
fast
foods
and high rate cardiovascular diseases. Independent studies have
also
linked high rate of obesity in adults to increased consumption of fatty
meals
,
mostly
ready-made
foods
.
Hence
, the
positive
effects of consuming home and
freshly
prepared cuisines can never
be overemphasized
, as their benefits transcend the impeccable taste derived from them and the satisfaction of making your
own
food.

In conclusion
, while there are
many
advantages to eating
fast
meals
, the disadvantages, which include, increased cardiovascular diseases and obesity associated with the high
fat
content
obviously
outweigh their merits
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people prefer to work as part of group, while others prefer to work independently, which do you prefer? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
264 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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