Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Some people like doing work by hand. Others prefer using machines. Which do you prefer? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. v.1

Some people like doing work by hand. Others prefer using machines. Which do you prefer? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. v. 1
Some people would argue that expanding the period of imprisonment is the most effective method to deter criminals, while others believe that reducing crime rate has alternative options. I agree with this as providing training and education for prisoners can reduce the rate of crime effectively. A better alternative way of reducing crime is by providing staff training and education. Most of the root cause of committing crime is a financial problem. This means that people are easy to be unemployment because of lacking professional skills and without any diploma. Hence, they have to commit a crime to survive. To illustrate this, a long-term national program in Welsh in 2015 showed that less than 5% of people, who has skill training and education, has had a record of committing a crime. Therefore, I agree entirely that reducing crime can utilize alternative way. It is widely believed that light punishment is regarded as to be soft on crime. One for this reason is that most people consider a severe punishment as the best way to deter crimes. In fact, there does not have a direct connection between the level of punishment and the criminal estimate. For instance, the United States still has the highest crime rate even they have the highest incarceration rate and harsh sentencing in the world. Besides, two-thirds of released prisoners are rearrested with three years. In conclusion, although views might differ on the issue of how to reduce the crime rate, I agree that there is a better option to lower the number of offenders by providing professional training and education.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
would argue that expanding the period of imprisonment is the most effective method to deter criminals, while others believe that reducing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
has alternative options. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this as providing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
training
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
for prisoners can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
effectively
.

A better alternative way of reducing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
is by providing staff
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
training
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
. Most of the root cause of committing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
is a financial problem. This means that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are easy to be unemployment
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of lacking professional
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
and without any diploma.
Hence
, they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
commit a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
to survive. To illustrate this, a long-term national program in Welsh in 2015
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
that less than 5% of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, who has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skill
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
training
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
, has had a record of committing a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
.
Therefore
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
entirely
that reducing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
can utilize alternative way.

It is
widely
believed that light punishment
is regarded
as to be soft on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
. One
for this reason
is that most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
consider a severe punishment as the best way to deter
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crimes
. In fact, there does not have a direct
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
connection between
the level of punishment and the criminal estimate.
For instance
, the United States
still
has the highest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
even they have the highest incarceration
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
and harsh sentencing in the world.
Besides
, two-thirds of released prisoners
are rearrested
with three years.

In conclusion
, although views might differ on the issue of how to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
crime
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that there is a better option to lower the number of offenders by providing professional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
training
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
education
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people like doing work by hand. Others prefer using machines. Which do you prefer? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
264 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts