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Some people get in debt by buy things they don't need and can't afford. What are the reasons for this behavior? What action can be taken to prevent people from having this problem?

Some people get in debt by buy things they don't need and can't afford. What are the reasons for this behavior? What action can be taken to prevent people from having this problem? r9Kn
In This modern life, masses public debutante into buy new things that even they not necessary and can not pay. First, nowdays people have plethora of varieties in the market. Here consequently they might have confusion to what to buy and what not to purchase. However, the public might awareness of advertisement for various products available in the market. Here, citizens spend a lot off amount upon unnecessary items and then thinks to return it back to the particular shop due to contradicts they may not exchange it on contracts to
In This modern life, masses public debutante into
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
new things that even they not necessary and can not pay.

First
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
nowdays
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
have plethora of
The usual preposition for "varieties" is "of" not "in." Revise: "varieties of".
varieties in
the market. Here
consequently
they might have confusion to what to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
and what not to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchase
.
However
, the public might awareness of advertisement for various products available in the market. Here, citizens spend a lot off amount upon unnecessary items and then
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thinks
to return it back to the particular shop due to contradicts they may not exchange it on contracts to

IELTS essay Some people get in debt by buy things they don't need and can't afford. What are the reasons for this behavior? What action can be taken to prevent people from having this problem?

Essay
  American English
2 paragraphs
90 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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