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Some people feel that paparazzi should not follow celebrities and invade their privacy by taking pictures of them everywhere, while others believe this is just the price of fame.

Some people feel that paparazzi should not follow celebrities and invade their privacy by taking pictures of them everywhere, while others believe this is just the price of fame. 83Al
It is obvious that celebrities are one of the most important figures for all over the world. As they are being wondered and attracted by the public, media organs follow them to catch up with the updates about them. There are some advantages and drawbacks for this view that is going to be discussed below. To start with the advantages, famous people are thought of as the role model for people. They follow, inspire and behave like the admired person. When paparazzi chase them to see what they are doing in daily life, there might be a good chance to show to people their good sides. For example, when I was a teenager, I could be able to follow my celebrity on TV. She is one of the singers who read the most books in my country. I have always inspired by her attitude and read more books than ever. Another positive effect is that famous brands have frequently a possibility to show their new seasons on famous people thanks to the media. The last advantage is that it is a need for employed people who are working in that business. They earn much more money by taking distinct photographs of celebrities. However, there are some disadvantages to take their photos and sharing on social media. Firstly, privacy is being invaded in this way. Celebrities are normal people like those who deserve to live peacefully and quietly. Secondly, they do not have to wear properly to seem proper and fashioned. It tires them and affects their performances. It is bothering to be ready of all the time. For instance, I, as a woman, can not wear makeup every day. I sometimes need to be plain and modest to refresh myself not to wear down my face needs to rest. In conclusion, frankly saying, there are some advantages and disadvantages in every situation, but one side overweight the other. I believe that famous people should always be prepared to be seen and traced. They are perfect examples for the communities. It is the price of their business.
It is obvious that celebrities are one of the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
figures for all over the world. As they are
being wondered
and attracted by the public, media organs follow them to catch up with the updates about them. There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advantages
and drawbacks for this view
that is
going to
be discussed
below.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advantages
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
famous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
of as the role model for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. They follow, inspire and behave like the admired person. When paparazzi chase them to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
what they are doing in daily life, there might be a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
chance to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
sides.
For example
, when I was a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenager
, I could be able to follow my celebrity on TV. She is one of the singers who read the most books in my country. I have always inspired by her attitude and read more books than ever. Another
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
effect is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
famous
brands have
frequently
a possibility to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
show
their new seasons on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
famous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
thanks
to the media. The last
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advantage
is that it is a need for employed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who are working in that business. They earn much more money by taking distinct photographs of celebrities.

However
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
disadvantages to take their photos and sharing on social media.
Firstly
, privacy is
being invaded
in this way. Celebrities are normal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
like those who deserve to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
peacefully
and
quietly
.
Secondly
, they do not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
wear
properly
to seem proper and fashioned. It tires them and affects their performances. It is bothering to be ready of all the time.
For instance
, I, as a woman, can not wear makeup every day. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
need to be plain and modest to refresh myself not to wear down my face needs to rest.

In conclusion
,
frankly
saying, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
advantages
and disadvantages in every situation,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
one side overweight the other. I believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
famous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should always
be prepared
to be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
and traced. They are perfect examples for the communities. It is the price of their business.
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IELTS essay Some people feel that paparazzi should not follow celebrities and invade their privacy by taking pictures of them everywhere, while others believe this is just the price of fame.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
346 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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