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Some people fail in school but end up being successful in life. Why do you think that is the case? What is the most important thing to succeed in life? v.1

Some people fail in school but end up being successful in life. Why do you think that is the case? What is the most important thing to succeed in life? v. 1
School plays a vital role in the development of a person. Pupils learn numerous things and gain knowledge of different subjects. However, some folks fail in school, but they become successful in their life. The following paragraphs will discuss the reason behind it and the main initiative to get success in life as well. To initiate with, many people are talented and skilled; however, they are not interested in school education and studies, but due to their expertise and qualifications, they achieve their desired goals. For instance, Suresh Rain, an Indian cricketer failed in his 10th standard, but due to his hard work and excellent cricketing skills, he gained popularity and became the prominent face of the Indian cricket team. Moreover, several folks want to do out of the box activities, so they work in desirable fields in which they wish to gain success; hence, they take less interest in their school studies. On the other hand, forgetting hard work with full dedication is the main feature. One can learn anything with their hard work and proper dedication towards their aim of life. For example, Mark Zuckerburg C. E. O of Facebook was not perfect in technology, but he wanted to make the world closer on a single platform, so he did a lot of hard work and invented Facebook. Surprisingly, he is a college dropout. In conclusion, success in life and schooling are two different things. Masses can get success by their talent, and hard work. However, their education does not matter a lot if they have full dedication towards their future goal of life.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
School
plays a vital role in the development of a person. Pupils learn numerous things and gain knowledge of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
subjects.
However
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
folks fail in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they become successful in their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
. The following paragraphs will discuss the reason behind it and the main initiative to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
success
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
as well
.

To initiate with,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are talented
and skilled;
however
, they are not interested in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
education and studies,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
due to their expertise and qualifications, they achieve their desired goals.
For instance
, Suresh Rain, an Indian cricketer failed in his 10th standard,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
due to his
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
and excellent cricketing
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
, he gained popularity and became the prominent face of the Indian cricket team.
Moreover
, several folks want to do out of the box activities,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
in desirable fields in which they wish to gain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
success
;
hence
, they take less interest in their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
studies.

On the other hand
, forgetting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
with full dedication is the main feature. One can learn anything with their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
and proper dedication towards their aim of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
For example
, Mark
Possible spelling mistake found.
Zuckerburg
C. E. O of Facebook was not perfect in technology,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
he wanted to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the world closer on a single platform,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
he did
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
and invented Facebook.
Surprisingly
, he is a college dropout.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
success
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
and schooling are two
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
things. Masses can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
success
by their talent, and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hard
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
.
However
, their education does not matter a lot if they have full dedication towards their future goal of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
10Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
24Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
1Mistakes
You can never understand one language until you understand at least two.
Geoffrey Willans

IELTS essay Some people fail in school but end up being successful in life. Why do you think that is the case? What is the most important thing to succeed in life? v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
266 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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