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Some people consider playing sports is beneficial for schoolchildren. Some, however, believe sport activities also have some drawbacks. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of children playing sports.

Some people consider playing sports is beneficial for schoolchildren. Some, however, believe sport activities also have some drawbacks. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of children playing sports. q6kdD
Today numerous schoolchildren are inclined to spend their time and disburse their money on sports. Consequently, there are polarized viewpoints pertaining this issue that while some people consider playing sports is benficial for schoolchildren, other parts dispute and dissent. In this essay l will elaborate this topic. On the one hand, we cannot sneer, ignore and, cursory the privileges of sports because whole people are informed and know that playing sports play crucial role to improve our muscles and finally leave strong body for us to fulfill and perform our daily works and, duties during our lifespan. Henceforth school authorities and staffs should spur and exhort pupils to sports and make eager and enthusiasm on sport. Because, students can easily cope and tackle with any kinds of impediments and hindrances during their education life if their body is strong and healthy. Once, l rode an academic article regarding this notion and article was showing that playing sports improve humans' mindset and brain beside his/her body. Thus, health brain is significant to compete with your opponent during the exams to go ahead. On the other hand, minority of people claim and believe sport activities also have several drawbacks so this cause imperfectations for students. Because some schoolchildren are tended to sports and spend most majority of their time in the gym therefore generally they ignore their assignments and homeworks so this cause setbacks on education. Foremost they cannot addict amd immerse themselves to their duties and tasks. Thus these students cannot be excel on education. To conclude, l consider sports have significant role on our body and if your body is good and aesthetic, this add extraordinary and fabulous confident to yourself. Consequently we should encourage and spur students to playing sports.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Today
numerous schoolchildren
are inclined
to spend their time and disburse their money on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
.
Consequently
, there
are polarized
viewpoints pertaining this issue that while
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
consider
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
playing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
is
Possible spelling mistake found.
benficial
for schoolchildren, other parts dispute and dissent. In this essay l will elaborate this topic.

On the one hand, we cannot sneer,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ignore
and, cursory the privileges of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
whole
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are informed
and know that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
playing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
play crucial role to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
our muscles and
finally
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
strong
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
body
for us to fulfill and perform our daily works and, duties during our lifespan.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Henceforth
school authorities and staffs should spur and exhort pupils to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
eager and enthusiasm on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
can
easily
cope and tackle with any kinds of impediments and hindrances during their education life if their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
body
is strong and healthy. Once, l rode an academic article regarding this notion and article was showing that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
playing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
humans' mindset and brain beside his/her
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
body
.
Thus
, health brain is significant to compete with your opponent during the exams to go ahead.

On the other hand
, minority of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
claim and believe
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sport
activities
also
have several drawbacks
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
this cause
Possible spelling mistake found.
imperfectations
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
schoolchildren
are tended
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
and spend most majority of their time in the gym
therefore
generally
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ignore
their assignments and
Possible spelling mistake found.
homeworks
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
this cause setbacks on education. Foremost they cannot addict
Possible spelling mistake found.
amd
immerse themselves to their duties and tasks.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Thus
these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
cannot be
Consider using the past participle "excelled"?
excel
on education.

To conclude
, l consider
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
have significant role on our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
body
and if your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
body
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
and aesthetic, this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
add
extraordinary and fabulous confident to yourself.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Consequently
we should encourage and spur
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
playing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sports
.
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IELTS essay Some people consider playing sports is beneficial for schoolchildren. Some, however, believe sport activities also have some drawbacks. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages of children playing sports.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
291 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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