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Some people claim that not enough of the waste from homes is recycled. They say that the only way to increase recycling is for governments to make it a legat requirement. To what extent do you think laws are needed to make people recycle more of their waste? v.23

Some people claim that not enough of the waste from homes is recycled. They say that the only way to increase recycling is for governments to make it a legat requirement. v. 23
In most countries, the reclamation of a garbage is a burning issue. Someone, deems that people are not participating in that process, as they should be. So, they suggest that the most effective method to increase the rates of recycling is that the government should make a law on it. I believe, to a certain extent, it would be beneficial, but the education is also an equally important. Firstly, to enacting the law on a salvaging process, it is a better strategy to force the humans to think about it. If the government will penalize the persons, who are reluctant to do this, then everyone obeys the rules. For instance, the countries which make it a legal requirement, such as Sweden and Finland, the recycle rate rises remarkably. While, in France, where authorities have not taken any restrict actions, humans exploit more garbage in baskets, rather than in reuse bins. Thus, a legislation plays an indispensable role in that matter. Secondly, to spread the awareness among the people are also crucial. Because most of them do not know, how to separate reusable materials or where they should put it. Therefore, the authority should educate them through T. V. Programs, flyers, and different campaigns. For example, in Singapore, they have started to learn their school children and conducted different activities in which their parents have also included. As a result, they have known about the benefits of recycling, owing to this their household litter reduces 60% of their annual weight. To conclude, the enforcement of law and education, compel mankind to obey the rules and regulations, which is not only beneficial for the environment, but also for the economy of a country. Furthermore, I personally think that the government should provide subsidies to the people, who produce biogas through digestion tanks, and give them compost bins to make it more effective.
In most countries, the reclamation of
Uncountable nouns are usually not used with an indefinite article. Use simply "garbage".
a garbage
is a burning issue. Someone, deems that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are not participating in that process, as they should be.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, they suggest that the most effective method to increase the rates of recycling is that the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a law on it. I believe, to a certain extent, it would be beneficial,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the education is
also
an
equally
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
.

Firstly
, to enacting the law on a salvaging process, it is a better strategy to force the humans to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
about it. If the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
Consider removing 'will'. (Usually, 'will' does not occur in a conditional clause, unless in the sense 'want to' or 'be willing to'.)
will penalize
the persons, who are reluctant to do this, then everyone obeys the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
.
For instance
, the countries which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
it a legal requirement, such as Sweden and Finland, the recycle rate rises
remarkably
. While, in France, where authorities have not taken any restrict actions, humans exploit more garbage in baskets,
rather
than in reuse bins.
Thus
, a legislation plays an indispensable role in that matter.

Secondly
, to spread the awareness among the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are
also
crucial.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
most of them do not know, how to separate reusable materials or where they should put it.
Therefore
, the authority should educate them through T. V. Programs, flyers, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
campaigns.
For example
, in Singapore, they have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
to learn their school children and conducted
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
activities in which their parents have
also
included.
As a result
, they have known about the benefits of recycling, owing to this their household litter
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduces
60% of their annual weight.

To conclude
, the enforcement of law and education, compel mankind to obey the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
and regulations, which is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
beneficial for the environment,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
for the economy of a country.
Furthermore
, I
personally
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should provide subsidies to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
, who produce biogas through digestion tanks, and give them compost bins to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
it more effective.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people claim that not enough of the waste from homes is recycled. They say that the only way to increase recycling is for governments to make it a legat requirement. v. 23

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
310 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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