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Some people believe they should keep all the money they have earned and should not pay tax to the state. Do you agree or disagree? v.3

Some people believe they should keep all the money they have earned and should not pay tax to the state. v. 3
Taxing its citizen, is the single most primary income stream for most countries worldwide. Certain sections of individuals think that they should keep all their hard earned money to themselves and not pay the government, any means of tariff. In this essay, I will discuss the importance of paying taxes to the state and how people can benefit from it. Firstly, there are huge de-merits of non-taxing. For instance, it's a widely known fact that in case of non-taxing, there would be a tremendous disparity among its residents. Without the state intervention, the rich get richer and the poor get poorer. Further, all state facilities are provided from the money collected from its people, in the form of tax. In addition, the government without any fund for its position or power, could be soon overthrown by big business magnate groups and can ruin the political stability of the country as well. Furthermore, there are immense benefits that can be provided to its citizens, by taxing them a little. For example, countries everywhere build their infrastructure facilities, provide free education to its citizens, pension for the non-working, from the money pooled in as tax from the commoners. As the government gets more money, it enables them to take better decisions and to remain stable in power. Even though people lose money, they are ready to pay taxes because of all the benefits that they could derive from the nation. To sum up, in my view, I believe that every nation should levy taxes on its citizens. Taxes, even though are collected by the government, are returned back to its citizens in various forms. Also, it helps maintain the political stability as well as contributing to the development of the nation.
Taxing its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
citizen
, is the single most primary income stream for most countries worldwide. Certain sections of individuals
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that they should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
all their
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
hard earned
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
to themselves and not pay the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
, any means of tariff. In this essay, I will discuss the importance of paying
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
taxes
to the state and how
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
can benefit from it.

Firstly
, there are huge
Possible spelling mistake found.
de-merits
of non-taxing.
For instance
, it's a
widely
known fact that in case of non-taxing, there would be a tremendous disparity among its residents. Without the state intervention, the rich
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
richer and the poor
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
poorer.
Further
, all state facilities
are provided
from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
collected from its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
, in the form of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tax
.
In addition
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
without any fund for its position or power, could be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
overthrown by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
business magnate groups and can ruin the political stability of the country
as well
.

Furthermore
, there are immense benefits that can
be provided
to its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
citizens
, by taxing them a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
.
For example
, countries everywhere build their infrastructure facilities, provide free education to its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
citizens
, pension for the non-working, from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
pooled in as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tax
from the commoners. As the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
gets
more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
, it enables them to take better decisions and to remain stable in power.
Even though
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
lose
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
, they are ready to pay
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
taxes
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of all the benefits that they could derive from the nation.

To sum up, in my view, I believe that every nation should levy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
taxes
on its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
citizens
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Taxes
,
even though
are collected
by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
, are
Consider using "returned".
returned back
to its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
citizens
in various forms.
Also
, it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
maintain the political stability
as well
as contributing to the development of the nation.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people believe they should keep all the money they have earned and should not pay tax to the state. v. 3

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
289 words
8.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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