Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Some people believe the large shopping malls are replacing local shops which is bad for local economies. What is your opinion?

Some people believe the large shopping malls are replacing local shops which is bad for local economies. What is your opinion? g5AJ1
In this modern era, where people are more specified towards their own professional and personal needs, they acquire change in all aspects of their lifestyle to enhance their requirements. For the past few decades, the economic situation was to be was steadily balanced, but in this present scenario, there are various fluctuations seen in our economic background. Let me outline various factors responsible for such cause. Firstly, shopping malls has created hype for people from all parts of society. In this occupied work schedule of individuals, people tend to burst their stress through the shopping. As a result of this, more area are subsided for the construction of shopping malls via depleting small local shops. This condition has become favourable for people living in urban areas while they do not consider the consequences behind the construction. Futhermore, shopping malls are a collective place for goods and services that is they provide household requirements and personal needs including food, garments and health care. Because of this bulk selling, marketing tends to be more for products purchased from big malls. As a result of such marketing, they strike the psychological bias of customers and they go more favourable with quality rather considering price and quantity. Due to this, however, local shopkeepers get affected and their business will not be at a steady pace. Because of this, the economy is variably in change. To conclude, it is of major importance to keep our economy balanced all throughout. A sustained economy builds an equal society. In order to avoid such imbalance, local shopkeepers should be provided space in larger malls to enhance their business in larger scale. All we should thrive is to provide an equal and better society to live in while providing equal opportunities to all living beings.
In this modern era, where
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are more specified towards their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
professional and personal needs, they acquire
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
in all aspects of their lifestyle to enhance their requirements. For the past few decades, the economic situation was to be
Consider using a past participle here: "been".
was
steadily
balanced,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
in this present scenario, there are various fluctuations
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
in our economic background.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Let
me outline various factors responsible for such cause.

Firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
malls
has created hype for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
from all parts of society. In this occupied work schedule of individuals,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
tend to burst their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
through the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
.
As a result
of this, more area
are subsided
for the construction of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
malls
via depleting
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
local shops. This condition has become
Possible spelling mistake. 'favourable' is British English.
favourable
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
living in urban areas while they do not consider the
The usual preposition to use after "consequences" is not "behind". Did you mean "consequences of", "consequences for", or "consequences on"?
consequences behind
the construction.

Possible spelling mistake found.
Futhermore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shopping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
malls
are a collective place for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
and services
that is
they provide household requirements and personal needs including food, garments and health care.
Because of this
bulk selling, marketing tends to be more for products
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
purchased
from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
malls
.
As a result
of such marketing, they strike the psychological bias of
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
customers and
they go more
Possible spelling mistake. 'favourable' is British English.
favourable
with quality
rather
considering price and quantity. Due to this,
however
, local shopkeepers
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
and their business will not be at a steady pace.
Because of this
, the economy is
variably
in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
.

To conclude
, it is of major importance to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
our economy balanced all throughout. A sustained economy builds an equal society. In order to avoid such imbalance, local shopkeepers should
be provided
space in larger
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
malls
to enhance their business in larger scale. All we should thrive is to provide an equal and better society to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in while providing equal opportunities to all living beings.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS essay Some people believe the large shopping malls are replacing local shops which is bad for local economies. What is your opinion?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
296 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts