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Some people believe the aim of university education is to help graduates get better jobs. Others believe there are much wider benefits of university education for both individuals and society. v.20

Some people believe the aim of university education is to help graduates get better jobs. Others believe there are much wider benefits of university education for both individuals and society. v. 20
The role that university education plays in a person’s life and in society is often a debated topic. Some argue that the main purpose of university education is to enable graduates to land better jobs, while others contend that university education has a wider array of benefits for both individuals and society. Both sides of this debate will be analysed in this essay before a reasoned conclusion is drawn. On the one hand, some believe that tertiary education has paramount importance in helping graduates finding rewarding jobs. For example, to practice audit in the UK, a person has got to have a certification awarded by one of the recognised professional bodies such as the ACCA. Without a degree from such an institute, it would be impossible to be employed in the profession of auditing. Thus, it is obvious why this point of view has garnered support. On the other hand, many opine that university education has a much wider role to play in both the person’s life and in society. For instance, many British universities have included ethics as a compulsory subject in all of their courses. As a result, university graduates are likely to be savvy of their moral responsibilities and thus can discharge them in a better way. Hence, it is clear why many people support this stance. Although both sides of this argument have indisputable virtues, however, it is felt that higher education plays a much more significant role than merely assisting the graduates in finding better employment. It is hoped that education will continue to refine the characters of both the individuals and the nations in coming decades.
The role that
university
education
plays in a person’s life and in society is
often
a debated topic.
Some
argue that the main purpose of
university
education
is to enable
graduates
to land better jobs, while others contend that
university
education
has a wider array of benefits for both individuals and society. Both sides of this debate will be
analysed
in this essay
before
a reasoned conclusion
is drawn
.

On the one hand,
some
believe that tertiary
education
has paramount importance in helping
graduates
finding rewarding jobs.
For example
, to practice audit in the UK, a person has
got
to have a certification awarded by one of the
recognised
professional bodies such as the
ACCA
. Without a degree from such an institute, it would be impossible to
be employed
in the profession of auditing.
Thus
, it is obvious why this point of view has garnered support.

On the other hand
,
many
opine that
university
education
has a much wider role to play in both the person’s life and in society.
For instance
,
many
British
universities
have included ethics as a compulsory subject in all of their courses.
As a result
,
university
graduates
are likely to be savvy of their moral responsibilities and
thus
can discharge them in a better way.
Hence
, it is
clear
why
many
people
support this stance.

Although both sides of this argument have indisputable virtues,
however
, it
is felt
that higher
education
plays a much more significant role than
merely
assisting the
graduates
in finding better employment. It
is hoped
that
education
will continue to refine the characters of both the individuals and the nations in coming decades.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
17Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people believe the aim of university education is to help graduates get better jobs. Others believe there are much wider benefits of university education for both individuals and society. v. 20

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
272 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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