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some people believe that Universities should allow their students to choose what they want to study besides their majoring subjects. other argue that students choice should be limited, and they should exclusively study what they are required to know for their future careers. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

some people believe that Universities should allow their students to choose what they want to study besides their majoring subjects. other argue that students choice should be limited, and they should exclusively study what they are required to know for their future careers. eKG9W
Nowadays, People is polarised into two groups regarding the notion that students who study into universities should be allowed to choose their favourite subject with majoring subject; however, other hold the view that which subject is important for their careers. its should be studied. I will discuss both views and give my opinion in the conclusion. On the one hand, People who support the first notion argue that owing to their favourite subject, They can develop skills. To elaborate, If students study their favourite subject with the main subject in universities that it can help develop their skill and get some extra knowledge. This skill and knowledge is beneficial because it will help student to find a more job opportunities and career progression. Hence, To choose a subject is a beneficial for students. On the other hand, The top-notch drawback effect is student focus only on limited subject. To explain it further, If students are not given to choose their favourite subject by universities. students study only limited subjects. therefore, Students can get depth knowledge. but they do not get other subject information. In Conclusion, Although, some people believe that students should not be allowed to choose subject by universities, yet I believe that it should be given as it increases skill and knowledge.
Nowadays,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
is
Possible spelling mistake. 'polarised' is British English.
polarised
into two groups regarding the notion that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
who study into
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
should be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
choose
their
Possible spelling mistake. 'favourite' is British English.
favourite
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
with majoring
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
;
however
, other hold the view that which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
for their careers.
Did you mean "it's" (="it is") instead of 'its' (possessive pronoun)?
its
should
be studied
. I will discuss both views and give my opinion in the conclusion.

On the one hand,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
who support the
first
notion argue that owing to their
Possible spelling mistake. 'favourite' is British English.
favourite
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
, They can develop
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
. To elaborate, If
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
study their
Possible spelling mistake. 'favourite' is British English.
favourite
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
with the main
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
that it can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
develop their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skill
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
extra
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
knowledge
. This
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skill
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
knowledge
is beneficial
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
to find a more job opportunities and career progression.
Hence
, To
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
choose
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
is a beneficial for students.

On the other hand
, The top-notch drawback effect is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
focus
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
on limited
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
it
further
, If
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
are not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
choose
their
Possible spelling mistake. 'favourite' is British English.
favourite
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
students
study
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
limited
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
therefore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Students
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
depth
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
knowledge
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
but
they do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
information.

In Conclusion
, Although,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
should not be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
choose
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
universities
,
yet
I believe that it should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
as it increases
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skill
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
knowledge
.
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IELTS essay some people believe that Universities should allow their students to choose what they want to study besides their majoring subjects. other argue that students choice should be limited, and they should exclusively study what they are required to know for their future careers.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
214 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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  • some people believe that Universities should allow their students to choose what they want to study besides their majoring subjects. other argue that students choice should be limited, and they should exclusively study what they are required to know for their future careers. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.