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Some people believe that travelling alone really benefits in learning a country's culture and experience, while others believe it is better to travel with someone you know. Discuss both these views and share your opinion. v.2

Some people believe that travelling alone really benefits in learning a country's culture and experience, while others believe it is better to travel with someone you know. v. 2
Being wealthy, people easily achieve good cheer. It is undeniable that having a large financial capital can lead to a sense of satisfaction with meeting the materialistic needs of individuals. However, money is not the only key which can open all the doors lead to cheerfulness. There are numerous elements, even simple and ordinary ones, can make us happy and delight. When you are rich, then you are capable of buying tangible things which required to lead a luxurious life. Living luxury brings happiness. Compared to middle class people, affluent ones can own whatever they want, like Accommodation in exotic places, first class tickets for international flights, high end cars and living in luxurious penthouses without a hitch. Moreover, in terms of life crises, It is easier for silver-spoon people to solve their problems. When the rich get sick, they easily pay for treatment at the world's best-equipped hospitals, and it is not something ordinary people have access to. This is all that makes them happy because being wealthy gives them a better lifestyle and better standard of living. However, being rich is not the only prescription which is written for joyfulness. It depends a lot to the philosophy and ideology of individuals how to seek for contentment. Many things can bring a sense of satisfaction to people. Drinking a cup of hot coffee on an autumn rainy day with someone you love is one of them which is simple and achievable for everyone. In the past, happiness for families was summed up in having a son, not only for the poor but also for the rich ones. Having a baby boy, for farmers and workers, it meant an auxiliary force for more income, and for the rich, it meant having an heir to their name. The role of wealth in having a happy life is undeniable, but living happily is not just for the rich. Having a support of loved ones, healthy children and more others play a decisive role in creating high spirits in people's lives.
Being wealthy,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
easily
achieve
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
cheer. It is undeniable that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
a large financial capital can lead to a sense of satisfaction with meeting the materialistic needs of individuals.
However
, money is not the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
key which can open all the doors lead to cheerfulness. There are numerous elements, even simple and ordinary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ones
, can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
us happy and delight.

When you are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rich
, then you are capable of buying tangible things which required to lead a luxurious life. Living luxury brings happiness. Compared to middle
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
, affluent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ones
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
whatever they want, like Accommodation in exotic places,
first
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
tickets for international flights, high
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
cars and living in luxurious penthouses without a hitch.
Moreover
, in terms of life crises, It is easier for silver-spoon
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to solve their problems. When the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rich
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
sick, they
easily
pay for treatment at the world's best-equipped hospitals, and it is not something ordinary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have access to. This is all that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
them happy
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
being wealthy gives them a better lifestyle and better standard of living.

However
, being
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rich
is not the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
prescription which
is written
for joyfulness. It
The verb 'to depend' requires the preposition '(up)on': "depends on".
depends
a lot to the philosophy and ideology of individuals how to seek for contentment.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
things can bring a sense of satisfaction to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. Drinking a cup of hot coffee on an autumn rainy day with someone you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
is one of them which is simple and achievable for everyone. In the past, happiness for families
was summed
up in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
a son, not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
for the poor
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rich
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ones
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Having
a baby boy, for farmers and workers, it meant an auxiliary force for more income, and for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rich
, it meant
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
an heir to their name.

The role of wealth in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
a happy life is undeniable,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
living
happily
is not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rich
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Having
a support of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
loved
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ones
, healthy children and more others play a decisive role in creating high spirits in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
's
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Some people believe that travelling alone really benefits in learning a country's culture and experience, while others believe it is better to travel with someone you know. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
338 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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