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Some people believe that teenagers should be required to do unpaid community work in their free time. This can benefit teenagers and the community as well. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that teenagers should be required to do unpaid community work in their free time. This can benefit teenagers and the community as well. 3Jjd
Community service instills empathy and sense of responsibility. Some people believe that teenagers should be required to do unpaid community work in their free time. This can benefit teenagers and the community as well. I believe it has many advantages to offer rather than disadvantages for teenagers. Volunteering for community service is a good practice for teenagers it helps them understand various aspects of life and aspire them to be good citizens. These kinds of services develop them emotionally and teaches them to counter various difficult situations. Such services are not only beneficial to the teenagers but also helps other members of society for example volunteering in old age home not only makes them benevolent but also gives them the idea of accountability, whereas for elderly people they act as sense of accompany and can be assistance of various kinds. I rather strongly feel community service is good alternative to spending free time idle and non-productive. Social service also makes teenager self-reliant and prepare them for essential key skills required for then to grow in the society like team building, adjusting with new people and social duty. However, there is some downside to these services especially for teenagers, since their young minds are extremely impressionable working in community can expose them to the dark side of the society which can be difficult for them to cope. There are chances of exploitation if left unsupervised. In some cases, teenagers lose their focus on their school and studies and fall into bad company. Such all incidents can be avoided if well supervised and worked in balanced manner. In my conclusion unpaid community work is noble act and should be encouraged in every school. Such practices are idle for all-around development of young minds and nurture them to be stand up citizens q
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Community
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
service
instills empathy and sense of responsibility.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teenagers
should
be required
to do unpaid
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
community
work in their free time. This can benefit
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teenagers
and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
community
as well
. I believe it has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
advantages to offer
rather
than disadvantages for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
.

Volunteering for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
community
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
service
is a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
practice for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teenagers
it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
them understand various aspects of life and aspire them to be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
citizens. These kinds of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
services
develop them
emotionally
and teaches them to counter various difficult situations. Such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
services
are not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
beneficial to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teenagers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
other members of society
for example
volunteering in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
age home not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
them benevolent
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
gives them the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
of accountability, whereas for elderly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
they act as sense of accompany and can be assistance of various kinds. I
rather
strongly
feel
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
community
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
service
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
alternative to spending free time idle and non-productive. Social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
service
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teenager
self-reliant and prepare them for essential key
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
required for then to grow in the society like team building, adjusting with new
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
and social duty.

However
, there is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
downside to these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
services
especially
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teenagers
, since their young minds are
extremely
impressionable working in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
community
can expose them to the dark side of the society which can be difficult for them to cope. There are chances of exploitation if
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
unsupervised. In
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
cases,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
teenagers
lose their focus on their school and studies and fall into
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
. Such all incidents can
be avoided
if well supervised and worked in balanced manner.

In my conclusion unpaid
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
community
work is noble act and should
be encouraged
in every school. Such practices are idle for all-around development of young minds and nurture them to be
Consider using a past participle here: "stood".
stand
up citizens
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
q
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IELTS essay Some people believe that teenagers should be required to do unpaid community work in their free time. This can benefit teenagers and the community as well.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
299 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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