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Some people believe that studying at university or college is the best route to a successful career, while others believe that it is better to get a job straight after school. Discuss both views and give your opinion? v.9

Some people believe that studying at university or college is the best route to a successful career, while others believe that it is better to get a job straight after school. v. 9
It is often argued that enrolling in higher education leads to a successful future, while others believe that getting a job directly after school is the best. In my opinion, being employed before joining the university makes a person independent, however, continuing the academic qualification play a key role in getting better employment opportunity and be competitive in the market. On the one hand, it is beneficial to start working directly after school to be independent. This is because, when a student starts their career in an early stage, they do not have to rely on others for their expenses and bills. As a result, they can have a free life with own earnings and satisfaction. For an example, according to the Australian Times published on 2019, people who have started their job, career after schooling are happier in self-supporting in comparison with highly qualified people. On the other hand, there are significant benefits of continuing the high level of qualification. Firstly, there will be a big chance of getting better jobs. If a person has a high degree of education, there is an opportunity to be employed in top professional. For an instant, to be a Doctor, a relevant degree is required, which is impossible to get from schooling. As a result, university graduates have big hope for higher position. Secondly, there is a big competition in the market. Most of the position requires good educational background, and if young people have qualified from university or college they will be able to compete with others. In conclusion, joining the workplace before postgraduate or undergraduate can help to be self-supporting, while continuing the study helps to get better jobs and compete with others. In my opinion, students are more likely to be successful in their careers if they continue their studies.
It is
often
argued that enrolling in higher education leads to a successful future, while others believe that getting a
job
directly
after school is the best. In my opinion,
being employed
before
joining the university
makes
a person independent,
however
, continuing the academic qualification play a key role in getting better employment opportunity and be competitive in the market.

On the one hand, it is beneficial to
start
working
directly
after school to be independent. This is
because
, when a student
starts
their career in an early stage, they do not
have to
rely on others for their expenses and bills.
As a result
, they can have a free life with
own
earnings and satisfaction. For an example, according to the Australian Times published on 2019,
people
who have
started
their
job
, career after schooling are happier in self-supporting
in comparison
with
highly
qualified
people
.

On the
other
hand, there are significant benefits of continuing the high level of qualification.
Firstly
, there will be a
big
chance of getting better
jobs
. If a person has a high degree of education, there is an opportunity to
be employed
in top professional. For an instant, to be a Doctor, a relevant degree
is required
, which is impossible to
get
from schooling.
As a result
, university graduates have
big
hope for higher position.
Secondly
, there is a
big
competition in the market. Most of the position requires
good
educational background, and if young
people
have qualified from university or college they will be able to compete with others.

In conclusion
, joining the workplace
before
postgraduate or undergraduate can
help
to be self-supporting, while continuing the study
helps
to
get
better
jobs
and compete with others. In my opinion, students are more likely to be successful in their careers if they continue their studies.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes
Language is the road map of a culture. It tells you where its people come from and where they are going.
Rita Mae Brown

IELTS essay Some people believe that studying at university or college is the best route to a successful career, while others believe that it is better to get a job straight after school. v. 9

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
301 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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