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Some people believe that students should learn whatever they like.

Some people believe that students should learn whatever they like. KlkOM
Nowadays there is an important discussion about teaching. Some people believe that subjects must be taught traditionally, and others think that we should adapt to technology and innovation. First of all, most of the schools around the world choose to teach their students in the traditional method, which means that students have classes in every field of education: English, mathematics, physic, history, ect. It can be important for youngster to learn about everything because every subject is important for their future, for example, a doctor should know about Mathematics and English. Furthermore, it is fundamental that teenagers can have the opportunity to choose what they want to learn based on their personal taste, it can drive them to be better professionals. On the other hand, it can be beneficial to the world and community, if these young kids learn about specific subjects that can be crucial to the future of our planet. If schools start to give information and teach about physics and mathematics, students will master these themes. Some people believe that some topic that are teach in school can be learn in other places, such as: Home, private institutions, extracurricular activities, ect. To conclude, I believe that some subjects can not be such important as the other. However, it is beneficial to the kids to learn about them, even if they do not like it. If someone wants to be an engineer, he should not only learn about topics related to engineering, but also about themes of importance for his common knowledge.
Nowadays there is an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
important
discussion about teaching.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be taught
traditionally
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
and others
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that we should adapt to technology and innovation.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, most of the schools around the world choose to teach their students in the traditional method, which means that students have classes in every field of education: English, mathematics, physic, history,
Possible spelling mistake found.
ect
. It can be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
important
for youngster to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
about everything
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subject
is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
important
for their future,
for example
, a doctor should know about Mathematics and English.
Furthermore
, it is fundamental that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
can have the opportunity to choose what they want to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
based on their personal taste, it can drive them to be better professionals.

On the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand, it can be beneficial to the world and community, if these young kids
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
about specific
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
that can be crucial to the future of our planet. If schools
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
to give information and teach about physics and mathematics, students will master these themes.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
topic that are
Consider using a past participle here: "taught".
teach
in school can be
Consider using the past participle "learned", "learnt"?
learn
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
places, such as: Home, private institutions, extracurricular activities,
Possible spelling mistake found.
ect
.

To conclude
, I believe that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
can not be such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
important
as the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
.
However
, it is beneficial to the kids to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
about them, even if they do not like it. If someone wants to be an engineer, he should not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learn
about topics related to engineering,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
about themes of importance for his common knowledge.
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IELTS essay Some people believe that students should learn whatever they like.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
254 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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