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some people believe that social networking sites eg facebook had huge negative impacts on individuals and society To what extent do you agree or disagree v.2

some people believe that social networking sites eg facebook had huge negative impacts on individuals and society v. 2
Apparently, social media has connected people globally so it became easy for masses to stay in touch. Although, some people say social networking has bad effect on persons and societies. Though everything comes with boon and bane so I disagree with the statement. In previous era, people had not had modes to stay in touch with people who live far from them, today social sites not provided the facility to talk or chat but they also got the chance to see eachother through videos chat. Moreover, they can share going activities with friends, near and dear ones. For example, Facebook, a social site which is helping people to stay in touch and doing numbers of activities at same time. Furthermore, this platform has proven the huge platform for the common people to reach their voice to high authorities by trending hatchtag regarding any issue due to this indeed authority does reply for the resolutions. Consequently, it reduced the gap between normal person and administration. To site an example, COVID-19 has locked everything in entire globe due to lack of facility people are facing so much problems but social sites are helping them for introducing their trouble to authorities so they can assist people accordingly. To conclude, people should use it wisely so they can get more benefits of it. Everything comes with two side if wise usage is done then it leads in positive way.
Apparently
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
media has connected
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
globally
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
it became easy for masses to stay in touch. Although,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
say
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
networking has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
effect on persons and societies. Though everything
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
with boon and bane
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
I disagree with the statement.

In previous era,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
had not had modes to stay in touch with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
far from them,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sites
not provided the facility to talk or chat
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
got
the chance to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
Possible spelling mistake found.
eachother
through videos chat.
Moreover
, they can share going activities with friends, near and dear ones.
For example
, Facebook, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
site
which is helping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to stay in touch and doing numbers of activities at same time.

Furthermore
, this platform has proven the huge platform for the common
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to reach their voice to high authorities by trending
Possible spelling mistake found.
hatchtag
regarding any issue due to this
indeed
authority does reply for the resolutions.
Consequently
, it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
the gap between normal person and administration. To
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
site
an example, COVID-19 has locked everything in entire globe due to lack of facility
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are facing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
Use "many" with countable nouns.
much
problems
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sites
are helping them for introducing their trouble to authorities
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they can assist
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
accordingly
.

To conclude
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
it
wisely
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
more benefits of it. Everything
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
with two side if wise usage
is done
then it leads in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
way.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
18Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes
He who knows no foreign languages know nothing of his own.
Johann Wolfgang von Goethe

IELTS essay some people believe that social networking sites eg facebook had huge negative impacts on individuals and society v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
235 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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