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some people believe that playing sport is important whereas others think it's just a leisure activity for some people

some people believe that playing sport is important whereas others think it's just a leisure activity for some people aq8Mw
Sports are very associated to entertenment, and in addition, is relevant to general health and well-being. Some can see sport as a hobby or leisure, although it can be a career plan for many. On my point of view, I considerate sport as a way to connect people and transform bad behaviours into good life-style. In this essay, it will be discussed both opinions. Firstly, there are many benefits in doing sport, for example, improvement of health, self estime, and body disposition. Also, it can increase the quality of spleep and work. It is important to cite that exercise practice make people more happy, and due to this fact, the chances to have a good social relationship is higher, as the chance to meet and reunite more friends. Sport is a part of our culture, and it has a universal language, so everybody can understand a game just listening or seeing by tv or radio. Many wants to follow a professional career, besides the huge pre-concept inside our society. It is clear that a small number of people acctually achieve their goal in become a professional soccer or tennis player, for example. But, this fact cannot be a excuse to considerate it a leisure activity. Parents usually incentivate children to play their favorite sport, and in contrast, they want them to follow a academic jorney going to university. Secondly, it is normal to see people refering sport as a easy way to gain money without study and work hard, and it reforce a wrong idea of sport as a not serious field. In conclusion, sport is a important part of our world culture, and we can see this practice since thousands of years. However, it needs to break some concepts and barries. Also, government funding should be more focus on sport iniciatives and competition, especially for population with lowest levels of education and progress.
Sports
are
very
associated to
entertenment
, and
in addition
, is relevant to general health and well-being.
Some
can
see
sport
as a hobby or leisure, although it can be a career plan for
many
. On my point of view, I considerate
sport
as a way to connect
people
and transform
bad
behaviours
into
good
life-style. In this essay, it will
be discussed
both opinions.

Firstly
, there are
many
benefits in doing
sport
,
for example
, improvement of health, self
estime
, and body disposition.
Also
, it can increase the quality of
spleep
and work. It is
important
to cite that exercise practice
make
people
more happy, and due to this fact, the chances to have a
good
social relationship is higher, as the chance to
meet
and reunite more friends.
Sport
is a part of our culture, and it has a universal language,
so
everybody can understand a game
just
listening or seeing by
tv
or radio.

Many
wants to follow a professional career,
besides
the huge
pre-concept
inside our society. It is
clear
that a
small
number of
people
acctually
achieve their goal in become a professional soccer or tennis player,
for example
.
But
, this fact cannot be
a
excuse to considerate
it
a leisure activity. Parents
usually
incentivate
children to play their favorite
sport
, and
in contrast
, they want them to follow
a
academic
jorney
going to university.
Secondly
, it is normal to
see
people
refering
sport
as
a
easy way to gain money without study and work
hard
, and it
reforce
a
wrong
idea
of
sport
as a not serious field.

In conclusion
,
sport
is
a
important
part of our world culture, and we can
see
this practice since thousands of years.
However
, it needs to break
some
concepts and
barries
.
Also
,
government
funding should be more focus on
sport
iniciatives
and competition,
especially
for population with
lowest
levels of education and progress.
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IELTS essay some people believe that playing sport is important whereas others think it's just a leisure activity for some people

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
314 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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